The Elusive You by Lockwood Samantha

Author:Lockwood, Samantha
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2024-01-22T00:00:00+00:00

Fragile

I wish I could feel without handicap

jump off a cliff without the whispered temptation

my own whispered voice saying to unclasp the chord

the chord tethering me to what I hold dear

straining with the weight to bring me back

I wish I could weep without being scared of myself

be able to look in the mirror with salty cheeks

and salty cheeks be all I see, no writing on the walls

writing of every little thing I hate, every mistake I have made

and one clear way to get rid of them for good

I wish I could trust myself to not break

to not shatter into tiny little pieces

tiny pieces of glass, dangerous and irreparable

I wish to not be irreparable

to see the tape written on the box

and handle the box with care instead of destruction

because only I end up destroyed

Things I Love

I love large sweaters,

sleeves branching past my hands,

laying there, limp

I love my favorite book

teal, crinkled, beautiful

I love it so much

I loved it 29 times over

I used to love brushing my hair

until each knot was out

and it was smooth as I ran my fingers through

but now I love leaving my hair unbrushed

wavy, soft, different

it got too frizzy and big when I brushed it

now the neatness is in leaving it be

I love the numbness of winter

laughing

layering

chattering

as snowflakes race to the ground

I love taking apart pens in class

I love listening to songs I haven't in years

I love wearing socks

I love going to sleep early

I love watching the sun set beneath the water at a beach

I love the rain

I love the stars

(oh my stars, I love you so)

I love knowing things are going to be okay

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