Show No Fear: A Bouncer's Diary by Bill Carson

Author:Bill Carson [Carson, Bill]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781844015320
Amazon: 1844015327
Publisher: Athena Press
Published: 2005-08-22T16:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER FOUR

Zero Tolerance

It’s not all doom and gloom we had some good laughs as well, I used to go to the office at Ealing to collect the wages for the lads on Saturday evenings so I was sometimes a little late arriving at the club.

This particular Saturday had just seen the defeat of the South African rugby team at Twickenham. The club was full of rugby supporters who had decided to bring in off the street the dirtiest old tramp they could find; they sat him in the middle of the dance area where he was given a steady supply of ale. His hair was grey and matted, one side sticking up and the other side was as flat as a pancake, he was wearing a vest which had taken on a life all of its own and was covered in some very dodgy looking stains. He was only a little fella but the jacket he had on was easily four sizes too big and the trousers were straight out of Charlie Chaplins wardrobe which were pulled right up to his chest, basically when he moved the suit followed a moment later. He’s got to go; I put my gloves on and get one of the other doormen to come with me to escort the old fella outside. Going through the crowd he started to respond to the shouts and jeers from the rugby supporters who found the whole scenario very amusing. He was starting to struggle and as we were passing a couple of attractive young women who were seated by the door, he decided to dig his heels in. A scuffle began, the timing could not have been better and as if on cue his trousers dropped to his ankles and minus any underwear therefore treating the two young women to a full frontal, a loud cheer went up and the whole place erupted into laughter. Eventually we manage to throw him out, we watched him as he zig zagged up the high street still holding a bottle of beer, with trousers at half-mast singing away without a care in the world. Brilliant, what a way to start the evening.

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