Sage, Smoke & Fire by Ryan Kurr

Author:Ryan Kurr
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Ryan Kurr
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER 25

A couple of rooms away, Leo was in the study, browsing the books on the shelves. There were more magical possibilities than there were books in the room. Leo didn’t need a psychic vision to show him that he was unhappy and always had been. It was something he knew, something he felt, something he lived. There was darkness, and its reach was scary, but it didn’t deter him from searching for a solution in the pages of the many books. He’d had no way of knowing as a child all those years ago that he would end up like this. Was he where he thought he would be? Absolutely not. He felt like a failure. How could he have known he would be so unhappy? How could he have known his daughter would die tragically? How was he to know that his entire life would be endless unhappiness?

He couldn’t have known. Only now there seemed to be a way out. Maybe. If there was a way, it had to be in a book somewhere. His success as a witch had already given him more confidence than his entire life as a man. Perhaps he was the one witch, in the history of all witches, who would be able to do what was thought to be impossible. It was this drive that distracted him from his ceaseless vaping and steady acid drops, at least temporarily. Spells for his specific blood type, Ayurvedic ointments and crystal baths, he tried them all that afternoon. It was a day full of a combination of spells, procedures, potions and mantras all ending in the same failure. Although Leo felt satisfied with his ability to successfully perform spells and design potions, it didn’t make him any happier. There was still an emptiness, a void that had only gotten wider with time and deeper with persistence. His efforts left the datura plants without their flowering trumpets, the bottle of geranium oil bone dry and his soul space unchanged.

After Leo had accepted the fact that he was unsuccessful, he started on his way back to his room to sulk in private. The door to Bisa’s room was open, and he stopped to peer inside. Bisa was listening to music and painting. Without invitation, Leo entered her room with the boldness of a squirrel forcing itself into a bird’s nest for eggs.

“What do you want?” Bisa asked briskly.

“What are you painting?”

“It’s not really about what I’m painting but how I’m painting. I’m trying some new…techniques.”

“I can’t paint for shit,” Leo said as he slipped his vape into his pocket. I remember my grandpa painting. I think it was my grandpa. He always painted these sad clown portraits.”

“Was he mentally ill?” Bisa asked as she continued to paint.

“He was Catholic.”

“Is there something you need, Leo?” Bisa glanced back at him over her shoulder.

“I was workin’ on some magic earlier.” He made quotation marks with his fingers when he said the word magic. “But no, I was just walkin’ by, thought I’d say hi.

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