My Own Best Enemy by Julie Christianson

Author:Julie Christianson [Christianson, Julie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2021-09-22T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter Nineteen

Nash

A bolt of lightning might as well have split me straight down the middle the second Emi’s mouth brushes mine. My impulse is to pull her in close and kiss her fiercely, but I hold back and let her dictate the pace. First she teases me with quick, soft nips, then her mouth slips to my jawline. This turns out to be my Achilles heel. Her touch is so gentle, so feather light and honey sweet, I don’t want this to end.

But when a low groan escapes my throat, Emi drags her lips away from me.

No. Don’t go.

I’ve been holding her close for only a moment, but time is already ripped into the before and the after.

Before: I’d never been kissed by Emi Jones.

After: I never want to stop kissing her.

That’s right. I’m in pieces now. Two separate men. Fight or flight. One Nash recognizes that he’s treading on shaky ground. The other wants to live in this space with this woman in my arms forever.

Even as I think this, Emi starts to tremble. Then she pulls herself away. One step. Two steps. Trembling all the way. She must be cold, so I haul my sweatshirt over my head and yank my arms free from the sleeves. After quickly working the whole thing right side out again, I hand the pile over to her.

“Here. Put this on.”

Emi unfurls the sweatshirt and clutches it to her chest, inhaling long and loud. Then she blows out a breath. The sweatshirt looks big against her body. Like the hood alone could swallow her. My pulse starts racing as I imagine Emi engulfed by my clothes. The warmth from me transferred to her. Her sweet scent transferred back. She shivers again, and I nod.

“Go on.”

“I can’t.” Her voice is small and quiet.

“But you’re freezing.”

She gulps so hard, I can hear it. “I don’t mean I can’t put on your sweatshirt, Nash. I mean I can’t let any of this happen. We can’t. Neither of us. For way too many reasons.”

My guts constrict, but I square my shoulders, hoping Emi can’t see the twist in my face. I know she’s right. I made a promise a long time ago not to care about anybody too much. Not to risk the pain of losing them. And so far, I’ve kept my word. But honoring a promise has never felt this bad before. Like claws tearing up my insides.

“Yeah. Of course not,” I mutter. “You’re right. I don’t want anything to happen between us either.”

Emi’s cheeks go hollow, like my words sucked all the air from inside her, and man, I hate seeing that. I want to breathe life into this woman, not empty her out. Which is exactly why we need to stay away from each other.

“Good. I’m glad we agree,” she says.

“That’s the reason I made separate appointments with the florist and party rental lady,” I tell her. “And I’ll reschedule with ’Til Death do Us Part too. That way you won’t have to be bothered by me anymore.

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