If I Say Yes (Say Something #1) by Brandy Jellum

Author:Brandy Jellum [Jellum, Brandy]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781620153673
Amazon: 162015367X
Publisher: Booktrope Editions
Published: 2014-04-24T23:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

TONIGHT HAS BEEN one big, fat mistake. Something I seem to be making a lot of. How I ever thought going out to Gravity was a good idea is beyond me. But how was I supposed to know that Reid was a silent partner in the club? All I want now is to get home, pour myself a glass of cheap wine, and soak in the tub. It’s already near midnight, which is just another reason why I shouldn’t have gone out tonight. I have work in the morning. My head spins, and I feel sick. Not because of the alcohol I consumed, but because of the foolish mistakes I have been making. The first being that I thought it was a grand idea to go out, and the second was following Reid to the private office.

I sigh, lean my head back against the seat, and remember once more how Reid’s lips felt against mine. The sensation of his erection pressing against me as he caressed me had filled me with desire. The sexual tension is undeniable. If we hadn’t been interrupted, I’m pretty sure things would have gone a lot further. Hell, maybe I should just give in and sleep with Reid. I can finally get him out of my system and back on track.

Of course, I won’t though. That would be breaking the most sacred rule on my list, which is to not have sex with a man I am not going to marry. No, the next time I give my body to someone, that person will be the one I am spending the rest of my life with. Though marriage is the furthest thing from my mind right now. I doubt I will ever even get married. The surest way to avoid any complications is to avoid all men, sex included. I’ve never been the kind of person to have a ‘no-strings attached’ relationship, or casual sex. To be honest, I have only been with one person my entire life, and it wasn’t all that enjoyable.

No wonder he strayed to your mom…

No. I shake my head. I need to stop going there. I’m not going to add that to the mess that I have made these past few weeks. I may not have complete control of my life, or my dreams most times, but the one thing I can control is not thinking of her. The thought of my mother, her mutilated body, her death caused because I couldn’t keep my ex-fiancé satisfied, is more than enough to put me in a downward spiral for weeks. I know because this has happened before.

Right after her death, I went crazy. Drinking and trying almost anything that came my way. I hooked up with a ton of men, always pleasing them. Nothing was ever in it for me. No one got to touch me. I felt that if could please every man I came across, whether it was a blow job or a hand job, whatever it took to get them off, that it would somehow make up for my mother’s death.

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