Disenchanted Evenings: A Girlfriend-To-Girlfriend Survival Guide for Coping With the Male Species by Barb Ewing; Maria Sude; Katina Z. Jones

Disenchanted Evenings: A Girlfriend-To-Girlfriend Survival Guide for Coping With the Male Species by Barb Ewing; Maria Sude; Katina Z. Jones

Author:Barb Ewing; Maria Sude; Katina Z. Jones
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Tags: &NEW
ISBN: 9781581127539
Publisher: Universal Publishers
Published: 2000-01-02T00:00:00+00:00


Part Four:

Riddles of the Male Species

49

disenchanted layout 2–29–00 7:31 AM Page 50

e nin gs D isench ante d Eveni ngs Dise nch anted Eve ni ng s Di senc hant ed Evenings D isen c h v

a

E

nt

d

ed

ten

E

a

ve

hc

n

n

in

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

g

e

in

nc

n

h

e

a

vE

nt

d

ed

ten

Ev

a

e

h

n

c

i

n

n

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

Question:

What is the difference

g

en

inn

ch

ev

a

E

n

between men and women?

t

d

ed

ten

E

a

ve

h

n

cn

in

e

g

is

s

D

D

Answer:

A woman wants one man to

s

is

g

en

inn

ch

e

a

v

satisfy her every need.

E

nt

d

ed

ten

Ev

a

A man wants every woman

e

hc

ni

n

n

e

g

is

s

to satisfy his one need.

D

D

s

is

g

e

in

nc

n

h

ev

a

E

nt

d

ed

ten

E

a

ve

hc

n

n

in

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

g

en

inn

ch

e

a

vE

nt

d

ed

ten

Ev

a

e

hc

n

n

in

e

g

is

s

D

Disenchan

50

ted

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

disenchanted layout 2–29–00 7:31 AM Page 51

han ted Ev enings Dis enc ha nte d Ev en ings Disench ant ed Eve nin gs Disench anted E ve ni n c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

n

en

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

Question:

What’s the best way to kill

e

n

n

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

a man?

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

Answer:

Put a naked blonde and a

te

v

n

en

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

six-pack of beer in front of

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

him, then tell him he can

g

ch

in

a

n

n

ev

te

E

only have ONE.

d

d

E

te

v

n

en

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

n

en

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

n

n

ev

te

E

d

dtenahcne

51

is

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i

D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i

D

D

disenchanted layout 2–29–00 7:31 AM Page 52

e nin gs D isench ante d Eveni ngs Dise nch anted Eve ni ng s Di senc hant ed Evenings D isen c h v

a

E

nt

d

ed

ten

E

a

ve

hc

n

n

in

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

g

e

in

nc

n

h

e

a

vE

nt

d

ed

ten

Ev

a

e

h

n

c

i

n

n

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

Question:

How does a man keep

g

en

inn

ch

ev

a

E

n

his youth?

t

d

ed

ten

E

a

ve

h

n

cn

in

e

g

is

s

D

D

Answer:

By giving her money,

s

is

g

en

inn

ch

e

a

v

diamonds and luxury cars.

E

nt

d

ed

ten

Ev

a

e

hc

ni

n

n

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

g

e

in

nc

n

h

ev

a

E

nt

d

ed

ten

E

a

ve

hc

n

n

in

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

g

en

inn

ch

e

a

vE

nt

d

ed

ten

Ev

a

e

hc

n

n

in

e

g

is

s

D

Disenchan

52

ted

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

disenchanted layout 2–29–00 7:31 AM Page 53

han ted Ev enings Dis enc ha nte d Ev en ings Disench ant ed Eve nin gs Disench anted E ve ni n c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

n

en

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

Question:

Why do men like BMWs?

e

n

n

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

Answer:

They can spell it.

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

n

en

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

n

n

ev

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

n

en

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

n

en

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

n

n

ev

te

E

d

dtenahcne

53

is

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i

D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i

D

D

disenchanted layout 2–29–00 7:31 AM Page 54

e nin gs D isench ante d Eveni ngs Dise nch anted Eve ni ng s Di senc hant ed Evenings D isen c h v

a

E

nt

d

ed

ten

E

a

ve

hc

n

n

in

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

g

e

in

nc

n

h

e

a

vE

nt

d

ed

ten

Ev

a

e

h

n

c

i

n

n

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

Question:

Why would women be bet-

g

en

inn

ch

ev

a

E

n

ter off if men treated them

t

d

ed

ten

E

a

ve

like cars?

h

n

cn

in

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

g

en

inn

ch

e

a

v

Answer:

At least then they would get

E

nt

d

ed

ten

Ev

a

a little attention every six

e

hc

ni

n

n

e

g

is

s

months or 10,000 miles—

D

D

s

is

g

e

in

nc

n

whichever came first.

h

ev

a

E

nt

d

ed

ten

E

a

ve

hc

n

n

in

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

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g

en

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e

a

vE

nt

d

ed

ten

Ev

a

e

hc

n

n

in

e

g

is

s

D

Disenchan

54

ted

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

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s i D

s

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n i n

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v

E

d

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a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

disenchanted layout 2–29–00 7:31 AM Page 55

han ted Ev enings Dis enc ha nte d Ev en ings Disench ant ed Eve nin gs Disench anted E ve ni n c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

n

en

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

Question:

Why do men whistle when

e

n

n

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

they’re sitting on the toilet?

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

Answer:

Because it helps them

te

v

n

en

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

remember which end they

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

need to wipe.

g

ch

in

a

n

n

ev

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

n

en

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

D

is

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D

se

s

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g

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in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

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en

a

i

h

n

c

g

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s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

n

n

ev

te

E

d

dtenahcne

55

is

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i

D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i

D

D

disenchanted layout 2–29–00 7:31 AM Page 56

e nin gs D isench ante d Eveni ngs Dise nch anted Eve ni ng s Di senc hant ed Evenings D isen c h v

a

E

nt

d

ed

ten

E

a

ve

hc

n

n

in

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

g

e

in

nc

n

h

e

a

vE

nt

d

ed

ten

Ev

a

e

h

n

c

i

n

n

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

Question:

How do you keep your hus-

g

en

inn

ch

ev

a

E

n

band from reading your

t

d

ed

ten

E

a

ve

e-mail?

h

n

cn

in

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

g

en

inn

ch

e

a

v

Answer:

Rename the mail folder

E

nt

d

ed

ten

Ev

a

“Instruction Manuals.”

e

hc

ni

n

n

e

g

is

s

D

D

s

is

g

e

in

nc

n

h

ev

a

E

nt

d

ed

ten

E

a

ve

hc

n

n

in

e

g

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s

D

D

s

is

g

en

inn

ch

e

a

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nt

d

ed

ten

Ev

a

e

hc

n

n

in

e

g

is

s

D

Disenchan

56

ted

d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

v

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d

e t n

a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

v

E

d

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a

h

c

n

e

s i D

s

g

n i n

e

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E

disenchanted layout 2–29–00 7:31 AM Page 57

han ted Ev enings Dis enc ha nte d Ev en ings Disench ant ed Eve nin gs Disench anted E ve ni n c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

n

en

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

te

v

Question:

What’s the difference

e

n

n

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

between a man and E.T.?

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

ne

n

v

te

E

d

d

E

Answer:

E.T. phoned home.

te

v

n

en

a

i

h

n

c

g

n

s

e

D

is

i

D

se

s

n

g

ch

in

a

n

n

ev

te

E

d

d

E

te

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n

en

a

i

h

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e

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ne

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d

d

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v

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E

d

dtenahcne

57

is

s

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d

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