Secondhand Heart by Kristen Strassel

Author:Kristen Strassel [Strassel, Kristen]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Kristen Strassel
Published: 2014-10-06T23:00:00+00:00

It took me exactly one afternoon to get my things together to move to Cam’s house. There wasn’t much I needed to bring, just my clothes really. I emptied out my closet into trash bags, and squished it all into the back of my car. All the boxes the military had dropped off into my basement were going to stay where they were. I didn’t bring my scrapbooking supplies, either. As guilty as I felt leaving that stuff behind, I had to do just that. Leave it behind.

I didn’t take off my dog tags. That I wasn’t ready for. I didn’t know if I’d ever be.

Call me a wimp, but I snuck out of the house in the middle of the afternoon for a reason. My mom was at some shake meeting, so she couldn’t rattle off every reason what I was doing was stupid while I loaded up the car. Like I didn’t have my own doubts, mostly named Ashley. This scared the hell out of me. Dad hadn’t come home from work yet. As much as he loved Cam, it didn’t erase the fact he was fucking his little girl. That inevitable sadness in his eyes was one of the only things that could make me consider changing my mind.

Cam was at the bar, working, like people with jobs did. He’d given me a key a couple days before. It was going to take some time to get used to this being where I lived. Something about it, the high ceilings, the white walls, the lack of fabric, it felt empty. Only Cam would make it feel like home.

I had no idea what time to expect him. Nightmare scenes starring Ashley high stepped in my brain. I trusted Cam, but it was everyone else’s doubt that kept the fear alive.

I opened the refrigerator. It was a takeout graveyard, forgotten leftovers from The Lonely Heart Saloon rotting in Styrofoam. I tossed them in the trash, leaving nothing but beer, orange juice, and ketchup.

This isn’t Mom and Dad’s house, Daisy. How did parents learn that magical talent of keeping the fridge stocked? I sucked at food shopping in Arizona, too. I was at the BX practically every other day. Apparently, Cam wasn’t great at it, either. Something else we had in common.

I needed to get some groceries. But I really didn’t have any money. That whole no job thing threatened to catch up with me at some point, and this looked like that moment. Shit. I really didn’t think this through. I never had to worry about things like food, or anything important. I’d only been responsible for spending money, well, forever.

I looked my bank balance up online. I didn’t even have a thousand dollars. Great. Cam never asked me about money, and I hadn’t thought about needing any. But now I was hungry, and that was something that happened three or so times a day. Hungry cost money.

After a shell-shocked trip around the dirty little Manomet supermarket, I had eighty dollars’ worth of food to work with.

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