Never Tear Us Apart by Murphy Monica

Author:Murphy, Monica [Murphy, Monica]
Language: eng
Format: mobi
ISBN: 9781472237200
Publisher: Headline
Published: 2016-01-04T08:00:00+00:00

“So you’re not going to let me see him.” My voice was more breath than sound and my heart hurt at the realization that I might never see Will again.

She shook her head, her expression firm. “It’s pointless.”

According to her.

I think you meant to send this to someone else.

I stare at the text on my screen from Katie, nerves eating at my gut. Last night I’d been feeling lonely and read over our few text messages like a lovesick idiot. I never got out of the text conversation with Katie when I sent the message to my client Linda, asking if we could reschedule our afternoon meeting for tomorrow.

Instead of texting Linda, I’d texted Katie.

If I ignore her I’m a dick. If I answer . . . I’m still a dick, because I’ve avoided her for over a week. I had no plans to contact her again. After that letter from my father, I knew I couldn’t keep this up. Toying with someone’s emotions when the person is already so fragile is dangerous and cruel.

I’m not sure if I’m talking about Katie or myself.

I text my client first, resending her the message that I can’t meet today, and she immediately replies saying that’s fine. I’ve fallen a little behind on projects and I can only blame it on my twisted feelings for Katie. Despite not seeing her for the last nine days, I still think about her. Constantly.

Too much.

Her text haunts me and I switch to that conversation, staring at what she wrote. I can hear her voice, sweet and hesitant. I can see her face, those big blue eyes, her slightly pursed lips. I don’t know how to reply without looking like an asshole, but not saying anything is worse, so I decide to keep it short.

Thanks for letting me know.

I hit send before I can add anything else and pray like hell she doesn’t reply right away. Or ever.

My phone buzzes and I close my eyes. Breathe deep. Open my eyes to read Katie’s reply.

You’re welcome.

That’s it. I exhale in relief. In disappointment. What did I expect? A warm greeting? A pissed-off “where have you been”? She wouldn’t do that. She’s too sweet, too hesitant, too unsure. She doesn’t date, she’s never had a relationship, and here I am toying with her like a complete prick.

But I can’t resist her. I don’t want to resist her. It’s like I have this need inside me that keeps growing and growing.

The need to see, to touch Katie.

I clutch my phone tight, stare at the screen. Start typing before I can stop myself.

How are you?

Good.

A pause.

And you?

She’s being polite. I need to stop communicating with her. I’m just getting myself in deeper and soon I won’t be able to climb out of the hole I’ve dug myself. I’m already in too deep.

I feel like shit.

Her reply is immediate.

Why? Have you been sick?

I haven’t called you or texted you.

My fingers hover above the keyboard. Fuck it.

I’m sorry.

I wait for her reply and it feels like forever before I finally get it.

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