Where the Devil Says Goodnight by K A Merikan

Author:K A Merikan [Merikan, K A]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Acerbi & Villani Ltd.
Published: 2020-04-23T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter 15 - Adam

Clouds took the strangest forms above Adam’s head, yet somehow all of them reminded him of bodies twisted together for pleasure.

He exhaled, weightless on the surface of the lake, which kept him drifting in the cool water while the sky constantly changed. A shiver ran down his body when the gentle breeze licked his damp cock, yet another reminder that he’d once again let Emil talk him into something he shouldn’t do.

A priest should not swim naked in public. Nobody should unless they were certain there was no one about. It was early in the morning, and the lake was a fifteen minute walk away from the village, but it was still vacation season, and someone might get the brilliant idea of making use of the beautiful day. Especially as August was coming to an end.

He had no idea how he went from adamantly refusing to participate in the skinny dipping to following Emil’s lead, but it seemed like the perfect metaphor for his recent life.

He’d come to Dybukowo to avoid the temptation of male flesh, only to meet a man who tempted him like no other. He’d hoped celibacy would keep him away from sleeping with men, and he ended up losing his virginity under the influence of an infernal force—that fortunately seemed gone from his life. And still, despite his conviction to never let himself go like that again, he’d been having sexual relations with Emil for the past two months.

Each time he returned to his narrow bed at the parsonage, he begged God for forgiveness and ruminated about the implications of living in sin without the resolve to clean up his act any time soon. But every morning he got up already thinking of Emil, starved for his attention like a needy puppy.

Emil was an addiction he couldn’t make himself kick. He knew that the persistent sin made the soul rot, knew they were putting themselves in danger of being discovered every time they were together, but Adam still couldn’t resist Emil’s touch and his wide, handsome smiles. Most men in his position would have at least had the decency of promising themselves every time was this one last time, but he’d made his decision back in the ravine, and he wouldn’t go back on it even if it left him in the horrible limbo of joy and guilt.

He only had three more months left with Emil, and he intended to get his fill while this summer of the heart lasted, so he could think back to it with fondness in the lonely years to come. Once he left Dybukowo, he’d never experience the harrowing need for someone’s presence, never long for them so strongly it made his throat ache. A piece of him would stay behind with Emil, leaving him incomplete and unable to love ever again.

He choked up when he thought of leaving Emil behind. He could already see it. The last, discreet touch as the bus arrived, and then watching him disappear in the distance, alone in a village that had no place for someone like him.

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