The Boulevards of Extinction by Brunneis A.;

Author:Brunneis, A.; [Brunneis, A.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781498230001
Publisher: Wipf and Stock Publishers
Published: 2017-02-13T08:00:00+00:00

Queen Elizabeth

The alternate biography of Bad Queen Bess [(a)]: bedding conspirators and religious upstarts before beheading them, she mixed business with pleasure by extirpating intrigue and heresy with adultery. She married husbands until she got bored with them in order to surpass her father’s record of consecutive polygamy [(b)]. More man than the sixteenth-century ideal of chivalry could stomach, more liberated than any twenty-first-century woman, there was no thought that went unrealized. Her motto: “I see, and say nothing—but do everything.” By making an example of Spenser for his epic satire on virtue, the poets were driven underground for Britannia to flower in the dark, producing such works as Sidney’s Defence of Mumbling and Shakespeare’s sonnets addressed to his wife. Impressed by the poet’s celebration of the duty of matrimony, his royal patron commissioned him to write the Chaste Wives of Windsor and applauded his climactic revelation of Falstaff as St. George [(c)]. Appointing Bacon to the Queen’s Council, her majesty soon regretted that a servant with so much potential was outshining her intellect at court; she retorted to his quips with the block and handed the executioner a sheet from the Essays [(d)]. Admitting her mother to be a concubine, inviting the Spanish armada into her port, declaring war on Protestant Europe, deeming tolerance the most frightful of dogmas, she fomented the Glorious Revolution a full century early [(e)]. Her sister, executed for being insufficiently gruesome, was a minor bruise in history compared to the Golden Age of Goriana.

a) A slut queen or Bloody Liz would have been better suited to the English Renaissance. A certain amount of oppression strengthens the resilience of visionary writers and grants annual pensions to the awful ones. Everyone wins, at least posthumously.

b) A daughter who follows in the footsteps of her father’s vices has a higher sense of duty than one who merely highlights his merits. The latter, to secure her public image, is dishonest about her origins. Virtues defend; vices define.

c) Dr. Johnson would later praise Shakespeare for his rigid morality. Out of fear of the stake Papa Bard’s opinions bombard the reader from every line.

d) A man can only know how sharp his wit is by having his words tested on himself, she said.

e) The more premature a Nation’s liberty, the less postponed its disintegration. A history of universal freedom is the saga of a wave rolling over. If only the ocean of civilization amounted to this condition, the record of antiquity to the present would be so easy to memorize, a multiple-choice exam consisting of one question and one answer: “Free?”—(A) Dead.

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