Scott's Blog of Doom Presents: The Complete Wrestlemania Rants! by Scott Keith

Author:Scott Keith [Keith, Scott]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Television, Wrestling, vl-wrestling, Individual Sports, Humor & Entertainment, Guides & Reviews, Sports & Outdoors
Amazon: B008BNEZXQ
Published: 2013-05-16T07:00:00+00:00

The Netcop Retro Rant for Wrestlemania 13

(2012 Scott sez: I had thought there was a later version of this rant, but apparently I've only done it once. This was definitely an off-year for the show in general, as it was promoted essentially like just another PPV on the schedule and as such made it easy for me to pass up.)

- Here's an interesting bit: Before Zen's copy of WM13, there's a copy of Bret Hart's tirade from Albany where he loses to Sid and then goes off on a curse-filled rant about getting screwed while Vince looks on. Eerily prescient of what would happen at Survivor Series later that year.

- Live from Chicago, Illinois. Original airdate: March 24, 1997

- Your hosts are Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler and Vince McMahon.

- Free-For-All match: Flash Funk v. Billy Gunn.

This is only included here because I find it amazing that Gunn went from nothing low-midcarder to "Bad Ass" Billy Gunn, DX member and major star with catchphrase. (And then back to midcarder again) This is a total nothing time-waster as Gunn spends most of it chinlocking Scorpio. I make sure to bug my roommate about wearing his hair exactly like Gunn. This was pre-Rockabilly, btw. That would be the *next* PPV. Match gets moderately good at the end as Scorp makes the comeback with a victory roll off the top rope, something which I haven't seen before or since. A moonsault hits the knees, however. Gunn goes to the top and gets crotched, yet pulls out a tornado DDT for the pin. Now *there's* a good finisher for him today. Not a bad match. **

- Opening match proper: The Headbangers v. The Blackjacks v. Furnas & Lafon v. The Godwinns.

The winners get a tag title shot at some indeterminate time in the future, which never comes into play. Hmm, there's two members of the Ministry of Darkness here: Phineas Godwinn, who would become known as Mideon, and Bradshaw, who would become known as Bradshaw. No one in the ring is over in the standard sense of the word. As a rough guide, the periods with {Furnas or Lafon or Mosh or Thrasher} v. {Not Godwinns} are quite watchable, and the rest is not. Blackjacks and Furnas/Lafon get themselves disqualified fairly quickly, leaving the epic Headbangers/Godwinns feud to reach it's zenith. Mosh should jump to WCW and become Saturn's partner. He's got the look and the music...hey, this *is* a little coincidental, isn't it? (In fact, Mosh got repackaged as Beaver Cleavage and then as D-Lo Brown's loser partner, so maybe he should have done that after all.) Crowd is dead for this. The Headbangers have the gall to work in a highspot to boost it a 1/2*, with Mosh doing a springboard bodypress to send Henry to the floor, then Rocket-Launching Thrasher onto Henry on the floor. Thrasher tries a moonsault back in the ring but misses. A pier-six erupts and Mosh hits a cannonball on Phineas for the pin. Oddly enough, at Badd Blood, Mosh would try that very spot and get powerbombed to lose the tag titles to the Godwinns.

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