Man Candy by Elise Sax
Author:Elise Sax [sax, elise]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Elise Sax
CHAPTER 9
I push Dirk away with superhuman strength, sending him flying backward to land on his ass. âItâs Wade,â I hiss. âFive days early. Iâm not ready.â
âWhyâd you stop kissing me?â
He has a point. We were set up perfectly to make Wade jealous. What have I done? âIâm sorry. Iâm sorry,â I hiss. âI blew the plan.â
Wadeâs coming closer up the shore, and I got nothing. All my scheming and wishing is going to land me a big, fat goose egg.
But I do have something left up my sleeve! Or in this case, in my back pocket. I take Marieâs super sauce out my pants pocket. I wave the metal cylinder at Dirk and give him a thumbâs up.
Iâve got about three seconds to spare before Wade comes in reach, and I fling the cover off the container and spray the whole thing all over me. In my hair. Down my shirt. Down my pants. Every square inch of me is doused. Iâm not leaving anything to chance.
âWhat the hell is that smell?â I hear Wade say, just as the fumes hit me, making my throat burn and my eyes tear up.
âWade, welcome home!â I try to say, but what really comes out of my irritated trachea, past my swollen tongue, is, âBade, momome mome!â
Iâm blinded and I feel like thereâs an elephant on my chest. âElp,â I say to no one in particular.
âWhat the hell is that smell!â Wade yells.
âElp,â I repeat with the last bit of air able to pass through my throat. With the initial shock of the pain behind me, I start to panic. I go from zero to sixty in the panic department in no time flat.
I flap my arms and run around in circles, as if Iâm preparing to fly. âElp. Elp,â I say over and over. But as far as I can tell, Wade and his companions are running in the opposite direction. The direction away from the stench.
I canât freak out about Wade running away from me because Iâm too busy freaking out about the noxious fumes that are killing me, and if Iâm not mistaken, are getting stronger.
âIâm bwind,â I cry. âI canp wee.â
âHold on. Iâm coming,â I hear Dirk say. âWe need to get you in the water.â
âElp.â
âYes. Iâm here.â
He gets to me just as I hear a loud growl. And then another loud growl.
âWas wat woo?â
âNo, that wasnât me,â Dirk says. The growls get louder and then thereâs a galloping sound that Iâve never heard before. Not the sound of a person. And bigger than a horse.
âOh my wod,â I say.
âBear! Bear!â Dirk shouts.
I try to think about what Iâve been told about surviving a bear attack. Mostly, I remember that itâs pretty hard to survive a bear attack.
Dirk takes my hand and tugs. âRun! Run! Bear!â
Bears run really fast, and weâve already established that I donât. So, needless to say, Iâm seeing my life flash before my blind eyes. Thereâs a little of my childhood, but itâs mostly images of playing Scrabble with Dirk, and our mind-blowing kiss.
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