How To Give Good Sex: A 100% Comprehensive Guide For Men And Women Featuring Actual Lovemaking Tips That Have Been Mostly Tested by Doctor Hans Uberass

Author:Doctor Hans Uberass [Uberass, Doctor Hans]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Sexy Press
Published: 2013-01-15T23:00:00+00:00

TRICK #5 – Porn

All men are excited by pornography. If you begin losing interest in your partner, ask her to hold your laptop over her face while you search the Internet for someone more attractive. Then pretend you're having sex with the porn actress.

TRICK #6 – Drugs

There are many drugs on the market used to treat impotence in men, such as Viagara, Cialis, Levitra, and Mycoxadud.

While these are effective at helping men gain and maintain an erection, some may have side-effects, including dry mouth, headaches, making your poop your own liver, bleeding rashes, oral fungus, broken ribs, death, square dancing, toothache, magpies, breast enlargement, and making you think you're Shatner.

Some men also have difficulty asking their doctor about these drugs, because of embarrassment. And you should be embarrassed, Mr. Limpy, because your doctor and his whole staff are going to make jokes about you as soon as you leave.

Jokes may include:

"He has no lead in his pencil!" and "There goes Softy McSoftdick!" and "He's going to poop out his own liver!"

So the best way to get these drugs is to rob a pharmacy. Use a gun, and shoot a few people to show you mean business.

Also, while you're there, don't forget to grab some amphetamines and opiates. Those are fun.

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