Choosing Hope: Moving Forward from Life's Darkest Hours by Kaitlin Roig-DeBellis & Robin Gaby Fisher

Author:Kaitlin Roig-DeBellis & Robin Gaby Fisher [Roig-DeBellis, Kaitlin & Fisher, Robin Gaby]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Penguin Publishing Group
Published: 2015-10-06T05:00:00+00:00

Amazing grace, how sweet the sound,

That saved a wretch like me.

I once was lost but now am found,

Was blind, but now I see.

’Twas grace that taught my heart to fear.

And grace, my fears relieved.

How precious did that grace appear

The hour I first believed.

The lyrics resonated with me. It was comforting to think that someone who was once lost was found, that someone who was blind could see. Perhaps there was hope for me. Hope that one day I would again be the independent woman I once was. A woman who took charge of her life, who was in control of her feelings and emotions, who lived her dreams. But how would I ever be that woman again when the thought of performing the simplest tasks made me freeze? Getting on an airplane. Going to a shopping mall. Walking back into the classroom. It just didn’t seem possible that I would ever be able to conquer the fear that was suffocating me—except when I thought about those lyrics. They helped me to breathe. I was once lost, but now I’m found. When I was at my lowest, they sustained me, if only momentarily. In a world that seemed so suddenly dark, that song provided a glimmer of hope. But now I’m found. But now I see. I needed to believe that I, too, could overcome. So I’d sing and sing until I finally fell still. Except that when I stopped singing, the turmoil started all over again. “God,” I prayed, “please save me from this bottomless pit of despair.”

So it went for days, then weeks.

I don’t want to live this way, I thought. This isn’t living.

This is a living hell.

I have to find a way out.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.