The Grace of Four Moons by Pravina Shukla

Author:Pravina Shukla
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Indiana University Press
Published: 2008-03-25T16:00:00+00:00

Wifely Adornment

Jewelry is commonly believed to be a “compulsory” marker of marital status; it dominated one part of my conversation with Mukta. Although Mukta is a self-proclaimed connoisseur of adornment, she admits to feeling sometimes that she is forced to wear certain items of jewelry—the nose ring, for example. She got her nose pierced after marriage, jaberjasti, against her will, to appease her in-laws. She was introduced to much of the jewelry she now wears with pleasure at the time of her marriage, when the “compulsory” items marking suhag—the blissful state of being married—became part of her daily adornment: sindur on the part through her hair, bindi on her forehead, nath on her nose, a gold chain around her neck, churi on her wrists, payal on her ankles, and bichiya on her toes.

Mukta wears this jewelry, she says, because it is parampara, the Indian tradition. Having heard this reason often, from both men and women, I asked Mukta exactly why this is the case, why the Indian parampara mandates that women be adorned. She alluded, in her answer, to the power of culture:

“Women wear jewelry in India because it has been made that way. After marriage, these have to be worn. Before marriage, you can wear salwar kurta, or any clothes. After marriage, it has been made that in a sari you should stay—the ladies. After marriage, they only wear saris. In this way, among us, this has been made, that after marriage one should wear jewelry, one should wear a nose ring, one should wear toe rings. On the neck, one should certainly wear a chain, a mangalsutra.

“That is why I wear these things. In our family, there is a mother-in-law and a father-in-law, and we are scared that if we appear bare-necked, somebody will scold us: ‘Why are you this way?’ That is why it needs to be worn.”

I asked Mukta if she also wore jewelry for beauty, for sundarta. Her response was expectedly enthusiastic, and it added a layer above the notion that jewelry symbolizes migration through rites of passage:

“Yes, I wear jewelry also for sundarta. Because before marriage, girls remain very simple. After marriage, there is some change. With the wearing of jewelry, there is some change. So, that is the way: also for beauty one wears jewelry.

“After marriage girls wear mehendi, they wear saris, they wear churis. They look totally different. You can tell that they are married. And that also feels nice. And before marriage, there is also this desire that ‘Once I am married, I will wear these things, I will look this way.’ That is why they wear jewelry.”

Once she has married, a woman must observe the stricter rules of caste and proper attire. Young women often wear silver jewelry, but once they become suhagin—decorated, married—they must change, as Mukta explained:

“In our custom, silver is worn on the feet. They say that people of low class, they wear silver on the neck, silver on the ears, after marriage. In maidenhood, we could wear silver on the ears.

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