Where Has Mommy Gone? by Cathy Glass

Author:Cathy Glass
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Published: 2018-07-02T16:00:00+00:00

Paula came shopping too, as she needed some more shoes, while Lucy stayed at home. I went shopping most weekends and I was gradually building up Melody’s wardrobe. Melody liked to spend her pocket money, but whereas before she’d been spending it on herself, now she wanted to buy things for her mother.

‘I want Mummy to have ornaments on her shelves in her room like I do,’ she said.

She spotted a charity shop and knew from when she’d lived with her mother that the donated items stocked by these shops were much cheaper than in the stores. Inside it was a treasure trove with plenty of choice. Apart from the rails of clothes, shoes, belts, handbags and so on, there were shelves of books, CDs, vinyl records, china and glass ornaments and general bric-a-brac. Melody was delighted and Paula helped her to take the items she was interested in from the shelves for a closer look while I browsed. I bought a pair of new oven gloves and a tea towel – it was for a good cause – and half an hour later we emerged from the shop with Melody having spent all her pocket money on her mother and carefully holding a carrier bag containing the tissue-wrapped ornaments. I hoped Amanda would appreciate how much care and love had gone into choosing those gifts, but I doubted it. Much of the joy of giving for a child is to see their parent’s face light up as they present them with the gift, but Amanda’s face was largely expressionless now. I feared she might not even understand the gifts were from her daughter.

Again and again my thoughts kept returning to Amanda even as we shopped, for it occurred to me that here was another experience she’d probably never have again, unless a care assistant took her to the shops. But would there be any point? How much would any experience mean to her now? It was impossible to know. Then I started to wonder if my own parents would ever need to go into a care home. I’d assumed that eventually, if they couldn’t look after themselves, they’d live with me or my brother. But that was in relation to them growing old and needing extra help, not dementia. If one or both of them suffered from dementia, would I still be able to have them live with me? It’s a dilemma faced by many families. Seeing Amanda at Oak Lane House had forced me to confront difficult issues that previously I hadn’t given much thought to.

On a positive note, Paula found some shoes she liked and I bought Melody some more casual clothes. I also bought some photograph frames and an album to mount photographs of Melody in for her mother. Having pictures of her daughter should help keep her memory alive. Melody had plenty of photographs of herself in her Life Story Book, which I’d begun when she arrived. I’d have copies made for Amanda and take them with us on our next visit.

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