Weird Tales #313 (Summer 1998) by Tanith Lee & Darrell Schweitzer & Ian Watson

Author:Tanith Lee & Darrell Schweitzer & Ian Watson
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Tags: anthology, short stories
ISBN: 9781434442925
Publisher: Wildside Press
Published: 2013-10-23T04:00:00+00:00

BEDDY-BYE, by F. Gwynplaine MacIntyre

Audrey had ripped off Betty’s head again, and was knocking it around the room like a football. I was trying to carry on a civilized conversation with Sylvia, but Audrey drop-kicked Betty’s head across the room; it landed in my lap, and Betty’s blue eyes stared up at me while her mouth smiled patiently.

Sylvia frowned at Audrey. “I paid a lot of money for that doll, Audrey. You ought to take better care of it.”

“It’s a cheap doll! It’s a CHEAP doll!” Audrey screeched. “I wanted one of those expensive dolls, the kind that talks when you pull the ring in her back. Betty is a CHEAP doll!”

“Well, you’d better put her back together, or you’ll have no doll at all,” said Sylvia impatiently.

“Oh, all right, Mom.” Snuffling pathetically, Audrey harvested the various arms and legs of Betty from the places where she’d flung them, and started putting the doll back together. That’s the problem I have when I date divorc‚es; they tend to have kids, and the wee kiddiewinks tend to be hideous brats. Audrey finished reassembling the doll—Betty’s head was on backwards, reminding me of something I’d seen in a horror movie once—and held it up for her mother’s inspection.

Sylvia nodded approvingly. “Very good, Audrey.” She glanced at the clock, and then uttered the fateful words: “Time for bed.”

“But, Mommmmmm…”

“Time for bed, Audrey. Go in and change, and I’ll be there to tuck you in.”

“Will you read me a story?”

Sylvia sighed audibly. “Aren’t you getting to be a big girl now, Audrey? Big enough to go to bed without…”

“I want a story! I want a story!”

“I’ll read her a story,” I offered, picking up Audrey’s storybook and glancing at the contents. The stories seemed innocuous enough: the three little pigs, the three little bears, the three little billy goats…

Sylvia eyed me gratefully, and then nodded to Audrey. “Go in and get ready for bed, dear, and then Uncle Fergus will read you a story and tuck you into bed. Take your doll with you.”

I know what I’d like to tuck her into,” I muttered, from behind the storybook. Audrey galloped off to the nursery, whomping Betty’s head against the wall as she departed. For five minutes or so, Sylvia and I were actually able to carry on an adult conversation, over drinks, and then Audrey’s hideous prepubescent lungs erupted from the nursery, “I’M READY FOR BEDDY!”

I got up, sighed heavily, and reached for the storybook. “Keep the gin cold,” I said, kissing Sylvia and shambling off to meet my doom in the nursery. “This won’t take long.…”

Audrey had flung her clothes all over the room and was now under the bed covers, presumably wearing her jammies. Her obnoxious face—a double-row of snaggle-teeth, surrounded on all sides by freckles—was grinning at me from the pillow. “Where’s Betty?” I asked.

“Over there.” Audrey pointed triumphantly. “Betty was bad, so I had to punish her.”

I looked where Audrey was point ing. Betty the doll had been bound and gagged with handkerchiefs, spread-eagled across the saddle of a rocking-horse.

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