The Sins of our Fathers by Asa Larsson

Author:Asa Larsson [Larsson, Åsa]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2023-03-29T16:00:00+00:00

They said nothing for the first ten kilometres of the return trip, Tommy in the passenger seat with his collar turned up, his cap a long way down his forehead. As if he were hiding away.

He’s always been such a brat, Anna-Maria was thinking.

She had been so pleased when he moved in with Milla, hoping she would provide the stability he needed.

Like one of the “cushion girls” at school, it occurred to her. She’d been one of those herself, seated between rowdy boys to calm them down.

She felt paralysed by her own helplessness. The bits of her brain that were supposed to come up with the right thing to say had obviously left for the day.

There came a point when you had to learn to cope with life, she was thinking. Divorces, illness, death. You can’t just lose it when they happen. Start boozing and end up in a ditch you’ve dug yourself.

She was going to have to talk to him now though. Because it couldn’t go on like this.

Only she had to do it gently and be sure to listen. So he didn’t become defensive.

She let her eyes wander across the lake, across the Torneträsk. Soft, white mountains, pale-blue shadows, blazing sunshine. It was lovely, really beautiful. Just looking at it ought to make her as calm as one of those people who rub crystals.

While he was perfectly happy to just sit there not saying anything. That was so childish, as well.

You could at least say sorry, she thought. How hard can that be? Then again, that’s an adult quality. Being able to understand that everything isn’t always someone else’s fault.

The last thing she needed right now was an assault claim being filed against one of the members of her squad. She was hoping those rotten kids would keep quiet. Though that was so wrong as well.

She took a breath. Counted to five on the inhale and five on the exhale.

Robert used to joke with her about that. Because they had five children. “Breathe,” he would say and then he would count: “One idiot, two idiots, three idiots . . .” All the way up to five.

“What a couple of fuckheads,” Tommy suddenly said.

“Those kids?” Anna-Maria said. “The boy was seventeen, Tommy.”

And when he failed to reply, instead appearing to sink deeper inside his collar as if determined to disappear, she said:

“What you did was completely unacceptable. You get that, right? I had a talk with them so if you’re incredibly bloody lucky, he won’t report you. But this can’t go on.”

She stopped. She was being far too accusatory.

“I’m worried about you,” she said. “Very worried.”

And then it all came pouring out of her. His taking sick leave so often. And smelling hungover at work. He had to pull his socks up and comb his hair and buck up, and for God’s sake go and talk to someone.

“Someone professional, I mean. Because I’ve no idea what to say. I’m not your mother.”

“Well you sound just like her,” he said from inside his jacket.

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