The Reluctant Escapologist by Mike Bradwell

Author:Mike Bradwell [Bradwell, Mike]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781788502252
Publisher: Nick Hern Books

It’s a scene about status not about swearing or drugs.

The other scene that the audiences had difficulty with was the Gratuitous Sex Scene:

The kitchen—early evening. BRIDGET is fixing a plug and MO is fixing her make-up. They are discussing BRIDGET’s ex-husband and her recent divorce.

MO. So why did you marry him in the first place?

BRIDGET. My parents didn’t like him. It was an adolescent rebellious gesture. They were quite right. However, you must bear in mind that we were married in the summer of 1967 and summer was a ‘love-in there’ and we young folks, we wore flowers in our hair and danced in the streets and loved one another and all that shit. It wasn’t till later I discovered that he was a pig.

MO. You didn’t get on?

BRIDGET. Er, no. We were totally sexually incompatible.

MO. Didn’t you make it with each other before you got married?

BRIDGET. Well. Yes we did but it was all rather forbidden fruity in those days. Subsequently, I discovered he was a pneumatic driller if you know what I mean.

MO. Only too well.

BRIDGET. The longer, the harder, and the louder I screamed the better he liked it. As long as he was satisfied, bugger if I was.

MO. Yeah, well, for some guys sex might as well be wanking in a cunt.

BRIDGET. How delicately put.

MO. Well, it’s true. I mean for a chick it goes a hell of a lot deeper than that, doesn’t it?

BRIDGET. Yes. That is true. I mean, let’s face it… most men wouldn’t know what a clitoris was if it jumped up and bit them on the leg.

MO. I was with this guy once and he was banging away and I said, ‘Hey, steady on. Take it easy’, and he said, ‘Are you trying to tell me I’m no good in bed?’ So I said, ‘Yeah.’

BRIDGET. Did you?

MO. Course I did. I can’t be doing with that kind of shit. And he said, ‘Tons of chicks have told me I’m fantastic in bed.’ I mean, he just didn’t realise that they’d been faking orgasms left, right and centre. I mean, it’s the easiest thing in the world to pretend to come, isn’t it?

BRIDGET. It’s just as well really. You know, he gets what he wants and he rolls over and starts snoring and you’re lying there in the wet patch. And as a bit of an afterthought he may roll over and say, ‘Oh, was that all right?’ And you say, ‘Oh yes, terrific!’ Anything to get rid of the sod.

MO. Well, I will say that for Benny…

BRIDGET. Is that the pretty young man with the nice teeth?

MO. Yeah. Credit where credit’s due. He gives you a bloody good time in bed. I mean, he’s a fantastic fuck.

BRIDGET. Fancy.

MO. It’s just when you get out of bed that the trouble starts. I mean, I’ve no objection to him fucking my body. It’s just that he will keep trying to fuck my brains. I mean he’s a loud-mouthed little punk with fuck-all to be superior about.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.