The Essential Tawfiq al-Hakim by Denys Johnson-Davies

Author:Denys Johnson-Davies [Johnson-Davies, Denys]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781617971662
Publisher: I.B.Tauris
Published: 2008-02-23T16:00:00+00:00

The Donkey Market

Cast

TWO UNEMPLOYED MEN

FARMER

FARMER’S WIFE

SCENE ONE

Near the donkey market. From afar is heard the braying of donkeys. Outside the market sit two men whose ragged clothes and filthy appearance indicate that they are out-of-work loafers.

FIRST UNEMPLOYED [to his companion]: Are you able to tell me what the difference is between us and donkeys?

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: You can hear the difference with your own ears.

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: The braying?

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: Just so, the braying.

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: Couldn’t this braying be donkey talk?

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: That’s what it must be.

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: So they’re talking now.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: Maybe they’re also shouting.

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: I wonder what they’re saying?

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: You’d have to be a donkey to know that.

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: They talk to each other so loudly.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: Naturally, don’t they have to hear each other?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: I thought donkeys whispered together.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: Why? Why should they?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: Just like us.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: Don’t worry . . . donkeys aren’t like us.

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: You’re quite right, donkeys are a civilized species.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: What are you saying? Civilized?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: Have you ever seen wild donkeys? There are wild horses and wild buffaloes and wild pigeons and wild cats, but ever since donkeys have been going around amongst us they’ve been working peacefully and talking freely.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: Freely?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: I mean aloud.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: Talking about aloud, can you tell me why we aren’t able to live decently, your goodself and my goodself?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: Because your goodself and my goodself are broke.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: And why are we broke?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: Because no one gives a damn about us. If only we had a market like this donkey market, someone would buy us.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: And why doesn’t anybody buy us?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: Because we’re local merchandise.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: What’s wrong with that?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: There’s only money for foreign merchandise.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: Why don’t we go off and advertise ourselves?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: How?

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: With our voices.

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: They wouldn’t come out loud enough.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: How is it that a donkey’s voice comes out all right?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: Because, as I told you, they’re a civilized species.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: You’ve got me interested. Oh, if only I were a donkey, like this one coming along! Look over there . . . the donkey being led along by the man who’s taking it out from the market. I wonder how much he paid for it! Look how proud and cock-a-hoop he is as he takes it away!

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: I’ve had an idea.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: What is it?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: Would you like to become a donkey?

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: Me? How?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: Don’t ask questions. Would you like to or wouldn’t you?

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: I’d like to, but how?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: I’ll tell you. You see the donkey that’s coming toward us, being led by the man who bought it. Well, I’ll go up to the man and distract him by chatting him up. At the same time you undo the rope round the donkey’s neck without its owner noticing and tie it round your own neck.

SECOND UNEMPLOYED: That’s all? And then what?

FIRST UNEMPLOYED: And then he’ll lead you off and I’ll lead off the donkey.

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