Lucky Stars: A sci-fi comedy series (The Alice Luck Space Adventures Book 1) by H. Claire Taylor

Author:H. Claire Taylor [Taylor, H. Claire]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Science Fiction, Humor
Publisher: FFS Media
Published: 2023-06-05T19:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER

ELEVEN

One of the things that Alice would have known, had she read all the materials, was that the planet of Bacc’nalia was only four thousand Bacc’nalian years away from its last mass extinction event. The meteor had struck only two hundred miles from what was now the capital, leaving a massive basin that was now mostly used as a dump site for murders—both accidental and intentional—and the spattering of lakes created by the impact of large meteoric debris.

The only Bacc’nalis to survive were a small religious sect that had taken to living almost entirely underground, thousands of miles from the impact. This tribe was in the practice of taking a wife if they could find one, subdue her, and convince her through threats and other forms of coercion to stick around. Somebody had to predict supernovas, after all, and living underground led to a whole slew of chores you wouldn’t expect, like nonstop sweeping, harvesting subterranean protein sources that liked to wiggle out of one’s grasp, and occasionally peeking aboveground to make sure it was still there.

When the meteor impacted the planet, these ground dwellers certainly felt it. The jolt resulted in days of indigestion for all. But when you lived underground, you accepted that sometimes everything jolted or shook or made belching sounds around you, and asking why wouldn’t change a damn thing and would only be a source of anxiety. Their deity didn’t like anxiety, which is why he had supposedly told them to burrow underground in the first place.

(In reality, the founder of the sect had eaten the wrong kind of fungus five days in a row. It had settled in his brain—really made itself at home there—and was the source of the voice he’d heard telling him to take his people and burrow where it was cool and dark and moist. And if Alice had bothered to research the topic in Allura’s database, she would have discovered that 99.999997 percent of religions started this exact same way.)

One day, a subterranean wife went for her aboveground check, to make sure it was still there.

And it wasn’t. Not all of it, at least. And what was left was scorched and covered in ash.

She told the other wives, and then, once things settled down aboveground, they embarked on an expedition to discover what all the fire and ash was about.

Needless to say, they were glad to have been underground when the meteor hit, but the feeling of relief disappeared once they went back underground. Wifery seemed much less important. So did sweeping. The food aboveground tasted better, too. And the colors! The scents!

And so, they decided they would return to the surface.

A few of the kinder wife-keepers joined the women, and the relief they felt at having survived filled them with an emotion they’d not felt in their entire lives underground. Oh, it was a magical land! How could they have missed it? Surely their god wouldn’t blame them for enjoying it.

Or enjoying each other, wife or not.

And so,

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