Jarrettsville by Cornelia Nixon

Author:Cornelia Nixon
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Counterpoint Press
Published: 2010-07-19T04:00:00+00:00

THAT EVENING WHEN I went out to try to bring them to the house again, they were gone.

I took it harder than I would have thought, blind, ferocious rage making me shake. I wanted to kill the men who beat Tim and burned his house. For what, because he had a dog? Because he read a book? Because some villain said my Martha lay with him? I wanted to kill every man who thought such a thing.

Of course I would not kill anyone. I was my father’s son, and I had to honor him. But at what point did you stop turning the other cheek? Even Jesus said, “I came not to bring peace but a sword.” I had to do something. I didn’t care if it was dangerous. No, dangerous was better. Dangerous was what I meant to be.

A few days later the papers announced a meeting in Bel Air to discuss the next move of the state’s Republicans, how to counter the results of the new Rebel government. I knew the Rebels would turn up, too, so many that I would be badly outnumbered, and that was fine. It was the kind of frigid winter night when nothing seemed to move, no moon to light the snow, when I rode there in the dark and waited for my turn onstage.

The others did not address the stated question for long. Instead they stood up to accuse their fellow Republicans of “unnumbered crimes.” They pointed fingers at each other for the shambles the party had become, Radicals blaming Conservatives and vice versa, each side shouting that the other had thrown away the victories in battle, Radicals by asking for too much, Conservatives for refusing to take what had been won—both sides drowned under the jeers and catcalls of the Democrats, who had come out in force to gloat.

I had no desire to speak in public, and when it was my turn, I stood at the podium, trying to imagine that I was my father, that I stood that tall. The hall was dimly lit by torches, but I could feel a hundred eyes boring into me, most of them with hate, voices already shouting over me.

“My fellow Republicans,” I said with irony, wondering how many were still there.

“They’ve all gone home! Sit down! Give up!” voices howled with glee.

Rage fired my voice. “Why are we so busy calling each other scoundrels? Haven’t you noticed we have lost the state? Let’s get together to defeat the Democrats next time!”

Shouts of laughter from the hall.

“You know they did it illegally. They stuffed ballot boxes in Baltimore. If you don’t believe me, read the Philadelphia Enquirer! Read the New York Times! The guys who did it bragged about it, and some people who tried to protest got chairs broken over their heads. No one was even arrested. That’s what we can look forward to with Swann in Congress and Hamilton in the Senate and Bowie for a governor. I never thought to see the day a man so ignorant would get hold of the state.

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