It's All About Him by Denise Jackson

Author:Denise Jackson
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: ebook, book
Publisher: Thomas Nelson
Published: 2013-02-05T16:00:00+00:00

* * *

EVEN AS MY HEART WAS LIKE A BIG BRUISE INSIDE OF ME BECAUSE OF ALAN’S LEAVING, I WAS BEGINNING TO HEAR THE CHORDS OF A NEW SONG, A SONG I’D NEVER HEARD BEFORE, A SWEET WHISPER THAT WAS TELLING ME ALL WOULD BE WELL.

* * *

Still, though, at that point it was just a whisper.

A Bigger Prayer

One day after Sunday school was over, I sought out the teacher. Robert Wolgemuth was in the publishing industry, a compassionate man with a deep knowledge of the Scriptures and a mellow, soothing voice. His beautiful wife, Bobbie, bubbled with the love of God. We found a quiet corner in the back of the big room, and I told them exactly what my problem was . . . or so I thought.

“I’m Alan Jackson’s wife,” I began. “We’re separated. Could you pray with me that he would come back?”

The Wolgemuths weren’t part of the country music world, and had to ask someone later who Alan Jackson was, but they put their arms around me. Bobbie’s expressive face was full of compassion, and Robert prayed for God’s love to flow over me.

Over the next few weeks, Bobbie would seek me out at Sunday school.

“How are you doing?” she would ask, and I knew she really cared.

“Please keep praying,” I’d say. “Pray that Alan will come back!”

By this point Bobbie felt comfortable enough with me to be very straightforward.

“Denise,” she said,“we love you and we are so for you. But we need to pray a different prayer. A bigger prayer. We need to pray not that Alan will come back, but that you will be the woman God is calling you to be. Of course we want Alan to come back. But that’s secondary. The first thing right now is that you seek God with all your heart. My prayer will be that God will show you what incredible love He has for you.”

I knew that Bobbie was right, and just about half of me was willing to pray that prayer. The other half of me just wanted Alan back. Period.

But I found out a great thing about God. He doesn’t require that we become completely willing. He doesn’t wait until our faith or our motives are absolutely pure and perfect. If He did, He’d wait forever, and while He has the time to do so, we don’t. He took my small surrenders, my little steps of willingness, and began to do little miracles with them.

It’s like the story of the boy in the New Testament who suffered from epilepsy.2 His father brought him to Jesus. By this point the boy was probably a young man; the father had gone through many long years of heartbreak and frustration.

Convulsing, the boy foamed at the mouth and rolled on the ground, his arms flailing.

“How long has he been like this?” Jesus asked the father.

“From childhood,” said the father. “But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.”

“ ‘If you can’?” Jesus repeated. “Everything is possible for him who believes.

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