I'm Not Here to Make Friends by Andrew Yang

Author:Andrew Yang
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: HarperCollins
Published: 2023-07-18T00:00:00+00:00

Yoona

It’s the golden hour, almost sunset, and we’re hanging out by the pool. Sabine and I are sitting on deck chairs, watching the others have a kind of water joust. Mari is sitting on Chris’s shoulders, Grant on Danny’s; Mari and Grant are trying to unseat each other using pool noodles.

“I’m afraid they’re going to hurt themselves,” I say.

I steal a glance at Sabine. She’s wearing sunglasses, and I can’t see her eyes. “Mostly the boys. Chris can carry Mari no problem, but I don’t know about Danny and Grant.”

“They’ll be fine,” Sabine replies.

Grant takes a big swing at Mari, but she ducks, then pokes him in the stomach. Grant doubles over, teeters wildly for a second, and then tumbles into the water. Mari raises her arms up in victory.

I shrug. “They’re not that close to the edge, I guess.”

Sabine nods. We watch in silence as Mari and Grant fight out another round, hammering each other with their noodles.

I want to have a normal conversation with her, some kind of proof that things are good between us. Something like our conversation at the pool, from before the leak.

“So how was your break?” I ask.

“It was okay.”

“Did you do anything fun?”

“I mostly stayed at home. Went to the mall once or twice.”

Sabine still isn’t looking at me, and from behind her sunglasses her face is curiously blank. There’s a faint smile on her face, but it’s a distant smile, one that says, I’ll listen politely, but I wish you’d stop talking to me.

I should go ahead and spit it out. “Is everything okay with us?”

Sabine pulls down her sunglasses, so that they’re resting on her upper lip. She studies me for a moment, her eyes still blank.

And then, all of a sudden, she smiles the same wide, dazzling smile from our last conversation in the basement. It’s so charming, and yet it’s somehow off-putting.

“I’m totally fine,” she says. “You asked me that already. Do I seem upset?”

“No, I guess not.”

She pops her sunglasses back up to her eyes, and leans back in her chair as if the matter is settled. I still don’t know what to make of all this. Twice, she’s said that she’s fine. She’s right, there’s nothing overtly wrong about her demeanor. But there’s a layer of frostiness between us, and I don’t quite believe that it’s all in my head.

From the pool, I hear a splash. Mari is waving her pool noodle over her head in celebration, and Grant is underwater again. A moment later, he pops up, coughing because of the water he swallowed.

“Man down,” he sputters. “I need a break. Been drinking too much chlorine.”

Danny thumps him on the back. As Grant climbs out of the pool, Danny looks over at me. “Hey, I need a new rider!”

I don’t really want to play this jousting game, but at least it’ll take my mind off of Sabine. Besides, I want to hang out more with Danny, talk to someone I don’t have to be careful around. I can make fun of him all I want, without fear of bad edits.

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