If I Should Stumble by Al Stewart

Author:Al Stewart
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: alcoholism, recovery, immigration, happy ending, tearjerker, asylum, new adult
Publisher: Beaten Track Publishing

* * * * *

Chapter Five

He walked past the shop again—to be sure. One pound seemed so little for the swimming float stick, called a noodle. There was a big box of multicoloured tubes waving outside in the wind like beacons. He selected a blue colour and took it to pay.

“It is one pound?”

“Yeah it’s a pound shop,” the lady said. “So guess how much every item costs?”

He smiled uncertainly and handed over the money, sure she would discover such a low price was a mistake. This woman could have no idea how valuable this device could be, or how perfect it would look in his room. Standing on its end, it would reach halfway to the ceiling, but if he laid it flat along the carpet, it could be part of a swimming aid army.

She stared at him. “What, love?”

This had begun happening more and more. What seemed like thoughts were turning into words—actual words that people could hear. Sometimes he thought he was becoming transparent, soaking up the outside until there was nothing left of him at all.

“Thank you very much. Have an awesome day!” he told her. Next to ‘wow’ and ‘yikes’, ‘awesome’ was certainly his favourite word. The lady shook her head and handed him the blue stick.

He wrestled, trying not to bash people on the head or be noticed at all but couldn’t stop the relief—at having bought this so easily—from breaking out on his face. He would have paid much more—stolen if he had to.

If only he’d been less honest back then, with an ocean ahead and no money to buy swimming aids. If only he’d stolen, begged, bullied, not allowed the boat to leave without inflatables, refused to get in at all despite the urging.

If he hadn’t got in, maybe it wouldn’t have sunk from the extra weight.

Sweat began pouring down his face and neck.

His initial pleasure from the blue stick began to turn to panic. One swimming aid would never be enough, not now.

Too late for all those people. Too late for the baby.

The pavement hurt as he landed on his knees and hands, but the pain was too far away to hurt enough.

He ran back towards the shop, past the houses and people without looking.

“I need more than one,” he gasped to the lady. She was frightened, and he was drawing attention to himself, but he had to have them.

At first, he picked up one, and then another. Around him, shoppers stared like they hated him.

Like they knew.

“How much for the whole box?” he shouted. “It’s an emergency.” In his haste, he pushed over a box of umbrellas and plastic boxes.

“Call it a tenner. Whatever. Get out of here and don’t come back.”

She shrank back as he handed over the money, and for an instant, he saw the face of the woman who’d help drag him from the water. She’d pulled and pulled but still he’d tried to swim back into the ocean to look.

“They’re still in there!” he screamed. “I couldn’t hold her.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.