Drowning by Margaret McHeyzer

Author:Margaret McHeyzer [McHeyzer, Margaret]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: General Fiction
Publisher: Margaret McHeyzer
Published: 2018-03-17T23:00:00+00:00

After doing my time in the hospital, I’ve been home for three days. I haven’t been back to school. I’m not ready to be reminded of what happened. Jared’s on his way over, and for some reason my heart is beating like crazy. Talking to the “mental health professionals” didn’t help with anything. They asked generic questions, and had the gall to ask, in veiled ways, whether Dad abused me. That made me angry, and I told them so. They asked about my dreams, about my memories of my mother, all sorts of things. They listened to me describe what happened when Tyler attacked Mrs. Richards, but didn’t offer anything to help me make sense of it. In short, it was three wasted days, and made me surer than ever that I didn’t want to see or talk to anyone else in the mental health field.

Tobias hasn’t come back to see me, and the text messages between us are strained at best.

Sitting in the family room, I flick the television off, completely disinterested in anything. I just want to see Jared, and know how he’s doing.

He sounded terrible when I called him yesterday. His voice was flat and emotionless. I know Jared so well, and I know things aren’t right with him.

The bandages are still on, but the wounds are healing. Dr. Estrada came in and talked to me several times. I was surprised, because I assumed that once she called in the mental health calvary, she was done with me. She asked me how it was going with the shrinks, and I didn’t have the heart to tell her it was a complete waste of time. I lied to her, and said that it was helping a bit. She believed me. She also gave me a number of a psychologist who deals with survivors of trauma, someone I could contact after I left the hospital. “If not for you, do it for your dad. He’s worried about you,” she said as she was leaving the room.

I took the number and shoved it in my pocket. I didn’t throw it out when I got home, either. Instead, I put in the top drawer of my dresser. One day, I might call it. But I’m fine for now, and don’t need it.

The number is etched into my mind, as are the words the doctor spoke about Dad. Dad lost Mom when I was young, and I don’t want to cause him worry.

There’s a blank space in my mind. A huge part of it is like white noise and static. Nothing happening. But another part is filled with wonder and confusion. There’s also a gaping hole in my heart too. Something inside me isn’t right. It could be the mind-numbing void in my heart or the persistent hissing inside my head that keeps me from thinking clearly.

A knock on the door drags me out of the fog filling my mind. Dad puts his glass down and walks over to the door.

“Jared, how are you?” Dad’s voice is heavy.

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