Calling Maggie May by Anonymous

Calling Maggie May by Anonymous

Author:Anonymous
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon Pulse


Sun, Feb 15, later

Today has been so awful. Physically I feel a bit better than I did this morning (though still not 100 percent), but emotionally, mentally, I feel completely drained.

When I woke up this morning, based on what I remembered of the night before, I had some little hope that maybe I’d managed to sneak in and get to bed without my parents ever noticing. That was a nice fantasy while it lasted. I guess I temporarily forgot who my parents are. I learned exactly how wrong I was when I got dressed and went downstairs to dig up some breakfast. Mom and Dad were waiting for me, and the minute I saw their faces, I almost turned around and went right back up to my room. The way I was feeling, all I wanted was to drink a huge glass of water and maybe make myself some hot food. The last thing I wanted to deal with was getting yelled at in Chinese.

The weird thing is, they didn’t really yell. I guess we’re past that now. They didn’t even act all that disappointed, like Mom did during our last big conversation. Mostly they just seemed worried. Concerned. Which was even worse. I used to feel guilty every time I did the slightest thing wrong, and I hated that feeling, but it’s nothing compared to the guilty feelings I had today.

I sat across from them, starving and parched and feeling trembly and weak, and let the Chinese wash over me, exerting just enough energy to understand what exactly they were worried about. Of course their first question was the obvious: Where were you last night?

So I told them, accurately, if not completely, that I was at a party.

Then they wanted to know if there was alcohol at the party. I guess my drunken state when I got home was less obvious to them than it was to Miss Irma. But then, they have less experience with that type of thing.

Lying seemed pointless, so I told them yes.

They were quiet for a little while. Then my dad said, “Since when do you go to those kinds of parties where there are kegs and no parents?”

I knew it was rhetorical, and my role at this point was just to sit there and look sorry for the shame I had brought on our household, but I couldn’t help almost laughing a little, if only internally. It just occurred to me at that moment that my parents were picturing me at a normal high school party. The kind of party that normal high school kids get into normal amounts of trouble for. How would they know any different?

I didn’t say anything, but I couldn’t help thinking, If only you knew. It’s so much worse than you are even thinking, and you are already so upset.

Once they had said their piece, I finally got some food and started to feel a little better, so I was going to go back up to my room on the pretense of “doing homework” and take a nice long nap, but Mom and Dad had other ideas.



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