Bear, Otter, & the Kid by T.J. Klune

Author:T.J. Klune [Klune, T.J.]
Language: nld
Format: epub
Tags: erotic MM, Romance MM
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

168 | TJ Klune

8.

Where Bear Stares

into the Sun

I KNOW you"re probably wondering if I said anything back to him. I didn"t,

but before you get all angry and are all, like, Oh my God, Bear, but he was

so sweet and cute and vulnerable, just know that I have my reasons. The

clouds might have been gone, and the ocean might have gone back to

wherever it came from, but I knew they were still there, somewhere. Trying

to reconcile with this complete change that I"ve been going through has been

more taxing that I"d first thought. For days now, I"ve wanted nothing more

than to sleep either in my bed alone or with him. Even when it"s with him,

I"m usually asleep as soon as I hit the pillow. My body is lethargic and my

thoughts muddled, but it"s not so very bad. Hearing him say what he said

has brought new understanding to who I am and who I want to be. If

someone can care about me that deeply, despite all my faults, despite all my

refutations, despite all my everythings, then that makes all the storms and all

the oceans worth it. I just hope that I can remember this. It"s a thought I fall

asleep to, and it"s there when I wake. It"s my mantra, and I repeat it so I

know that I know he is real.

But do I love him? I don"t know. Don"t get me wrong: I"ve always

loved Otter, but not in the way that we"re talking about now. If I do love-

love him (God, how lame does that sound?), it"s in a way that I"ve never

done before. I think often about how I felt about Anna. I try to compare the

feelings, but it"s just not possible. There are so many differences between

the two (aside from the fact that one has a penis) that it"s like I can never

feel the same for Anna as I do for Otter. But I know I could never feel for

Otter what Anna and I had. I think back to what Ty said, on that day that we

went to Portland to pick up Creed. It"s only been weeks, but it seems like

years. He said that he thought it was like your stomach was on fire, but in a

good way. He said it"s like you could not go on another day without the

person. I had told him I thought it was when all the stupid love songs on the

radio started making sense. The only reason I think we"re both right is

because his makes sense, but I found myself singing along to a Celine Dion

song on the radio.

And I got it.

So what does it all mean? I wish I knew. I still can"t seem to shake the

Bear, Otter, and the Kid | 169

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