Thanks, Carissa, For Ruining My Life by Woodburn Dallas

Thanks, Carissa, For Ruining My Life by Woodburn Dallas

Author:Woodburn, Dallas
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Immortal Works
Published: 2022-02-08T00:00:00+00:00


I am stoked that Rose invited me to her bowling party. I mean, I know it’s not that big a deal—there will be lots of people there. With all the cameras and hoopla, and Rose at the center of it all, I doubt I’ll actually get to spend any real time with her. Not like here at the gym, talking, just the two of us.

Still, I’m happy she invited me. Even though I completely suck at bowling.

The thing is, I really don’t want to see Carissa. With Rose busy at the center of the party, not only will I not get to spend any real time with her, but even worse I could be stuck making awkward conversation with Carissa the whole night. It used to be she ignored me in the school hallways, but lately she’s been giving me these sympathetic smiles. Not a real smile. The head-pat version of a smile. Like she feels so sorry for me.

I don’t know if I can stand an entire night sucking at bowling and having to deal with head-pat smiles from Carissa, who in all likelihood will be sneaking off to make out with Ryan behind the pinball machine.

Not that I care anymore. I mean, I don’t particularly want to watch my ex-girlfriend making out with someone else. But any lingering pain from our break-up isn’t related to Carissa. It’s more like aftershocks from the way everything fell apart—so sudden, like the ceiling of my life collapsed on top of me. You think your life is stable and then, in a moment, everything changes.

Actually, it’s not even about Carissa anymore. What I’m thinking about now is my dad, the giant of my life, looking so vulnerable with his pale shaved head. The chemo dripping into his veins. The sterile hospital smell. Coming home from school to find him sleeping in his recliner, a blanket pulled up to his chin even though it’s warm inside the house.

My point is that Carissa can make out with Ryan behind the pinball machine all she wants. She can make out with whatever guy she wants to. It’s none of my business (something she told me repeatedly in the weeks following our break-up).

It’s funny how annoying a person can get once you fall out of love with them. How did I never notice the way Carissa sometimes cleans dirt out from under her fingernails instead of looking you in the eyes when you’re trying to talk to her? Or the way she will interrupt group conversation with shrieks of laughter about an inside joke that not everyone understands? Or the way she’s always reapplying her lip gloss and licking it off when she talks, and then reapplying it again?

These are the thoughts that are ricocheting around my brain after Rose invites me to her bowling party and in the next breath says that Carissa will be there. I can’t place her tone—it almost seems like she is winking at me, emphasizing Carissa being there. Is she



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