S.J. Frost - Conquest 01 - Conquest by S.J. Frost

Author:S.J. Frost [Frost, S.J.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

“And when I cut Brian’s wife a check to make sure that she and the little girls would be taken care of, people sang my praises thinking I was so generous and kind. Not a fucking one of them knew it was nothing but guilt money. I couldn’t handle it. So I left the country and went anywhere I thought people wouldn’t recognize me.”

As Evan finished, a protective rush surged through Jesse, and with it, a feeling that had been lingering below the surface of his consciousness waiting for him to acknowledge it. He turned his head toward Evan. All of Evan’s defenses, all his walls were down. His pain, his fear, bared raw and open. In that moment, he knew without a doubt he had fallen in love with him.

But there was one thing he had to know. Jesse drew in a long breath and said on the exhale, “Were you in love with him?”

Evan’s head snapped toward Jesse. “No,” he said quickly, desperately. He shook his head, his voice softened. “I wasn’t. I don’t know if that makes it worse or better. I’ve tried to answer that for years. Worse because he died for nothing, having never obtained my full affection, or better because I at least came to the conclusion that…” he swallowed hard and gripped his legs near his knees to hide the sudden trembling in his fingers. He forced his eyes to stay focused on Jesse’s. “That…the man I love would never receive such treatment from me.” He broke their gaze as soon as he finished the last word, his eyes going to the floor again.

Jesse slowly turned his eyes away from Evan, his heart pounding.

Evan eased to his feet and moved for the doorway. “So, now that you know, I understand if you don’t want to stay here or hang out with me anymore.”

Jesse jumped up and grabbed him by the shoulder. He spun Evan around to face him. “All this time I’ve been thinking you might just be smarter than me, and then you go and say something like that.”

Evan blinked at him. “How can you still want to be with me after knowing how I disregarded another person so callously?” “Because it wasn’t your fault he died, Ev. The guy clearly had some serious issues, and if you didn’t trip him off, someone or something else would have. How were you supposed to know what he was going to do? You couldn’t have. If you did, you would’ve gotten him help, I know it.”

“I think you’re taking this too lightly.” Jesse laid his hand on Evan’s cheek, trying to tell him with his eyes what he felt in his heart. “If I am, then it’s because the only thing that matters about your past is that it brought you to me now. Nothing you’ve ever done will make me walk away from you.”

Joy, relief, pain, grief, choked Evan’s throat. He wrapped his arms around Jesse and leaned against him. “Jess,” he said, his voice hardly a whisper.

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