Once Upon a Time by Hazard Alessandra & Hazard Alessandra

Author:Hazard, Alessandra & Hazard, Alessandra
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: royalty mm romance
Published: 2019-06-18T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter 17

Jamil felt painfully transparent as they entered his rooms. If he really tried—if he really wanted—he could find a safe room for Rohan to spend the night in, a room that wasn’t Jamil’s bedroom.

He didn’t want to.

He stared at the bed as Rohan disappeared into the bathroom. With numb, unsteady fingers, he started undressing. He slipped into his sleep pants, shivering as the cool, smooth fabric touched the sensitive skin of his bare thighs and buttocks. He didn’t put on a shirt.

He got into the bed and lay down on his back.

He told himself nothing was going to happen.

Nothing was going to happen.

Rohan wasn’t interested in men that way. He’d made it crystal clear in the past.

Jamil’s fingers touched his lips. They still felt a little swollen and oversensitive. His eyes slipped shut as he remembered Rohan’s lips, his teeth, his tongue inside him.

His face warm, Jamil shook his head. It hadn’t been a real kiss. There had been nothing sexual or romantic about it. It had been pure need, an insatiable, soul-wrenching need to be closer, to be one, that manifested in such a way. Jamil had felt Rohan’s thoughts and Rohan hadn’t been thinking about the softness of Jamil’s lips or the pleasure of kissing him. Closer, tighter, deeper was all Rohan had thought and wanted. The desire to be merged had been so intense it left no place for things like sexuality and sexual desire. It was a desire, just a different one. Scarier. Hungrier. Baser. A craving they could no longer fight after so long apart.

His body was still aching with it, a maddening itch that couldn’t be scratched—or rather, it could be scratched only by one person.

Sighing in frustration, Jamil looked at Mehmer’s portrait.

But even looking at his husband’s dear, familiar features didn’t help. It had been a year and a half since Mehmer died. The pain was no longer fresh, the remnants of his torn bond barely there. He didn’t feel like a married man anymore. He had invited another man into the bed he’d shared with Mehmer and it didn’t feel wrong. He didn’t feel like he was betraying Mehmer in any way. The thought should have been freeing, but all it did was unsettle him. Jamil honestly didn’t trust himself not to do something… unwise now that his guilt was no longer there to stop him.

“Something unwise?” Rohan said with a wry smile, emerging from the bathroom. His dark eyes were glinting with humor. “Even your thoughts are so very proper and princely, Your Highness.”

Jamil looked at him exasperatedly, smiling a little. “Stop eavesdropping on my thoughts.” If it were anyone else, he would have felt mortified and furious. But when he looked into Rohan’s eyes, he felt laid bare—and bizarrely fine with it. Although it had been a year since they’d last seen each other, it felt like nothing had changed, the intimacy between them as comforting as it was maddening. Closer, not enough, more.

“Your thoughts are very loud,” Rohan murmured, shrugging his shirt off.

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