Confessions of a Naughty Night Nurse by Lily Harlem

Author:Lily Harlem [Harlem, Lily]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780007513024
Google: hCgD5IRtc8AC
Publisher: HarperCollins UK
Published: 2013-01-24T00:00:00+00:00

After settling three patients on Bennett Ward, young guys who’d had a particularly rough time, I headed to the nurses’ station. Rachael was still busy with the drug round and the two healthcare assistants were chattering in the office.

I picked up the desk phone and dialled Carl’s pager number. It only took a couple of minutes for him to call back.

‘You paged Doctor Rogers,’ he said, bewilderment in his voice that Orthopaedics was contacting him at midnight.

‘Carl, it’s me.’

‘Sharon?’

‘Yes.’

‘You OK?’ He stifled a yawn.

‘Did I wake you?’

‘Fat chance, I’m just out of surgery. Some nutter shoved a light bulb up his arse. Took me and Javier forever to fish it out.’

‘Did you?’

‘Yes, I managed to get hold of the slippery sucker just when Javier was losing patience and said we’d have to open him and perform a colostomy. I had one last go, didn’t dare squeeze too tight with the forceps, but at the same time it was so bloody high up his rectum and it just seemed to be wriggling deeper. I had no choice but to get a decent grip and hope for the best.’

‘And you got it?’

‘Yes.’

‘Great.’ I thought of Tristan and hoped he’d buy himself a proper butt plug and make a phone call to the marriage guidance office in town.

‘So why did you call?’ Carl asked.

‘I need to speak to you, about tomorrow night.’

‘You’re not ditching me, are you?’ There was humour in his voice but also apprehension.

‘No, not at all. I’m looking forward to it.’

‘So why do I sense there’s a “but” coming?’

‘There isn’t.’ I paused. ‘Well there is, kind of.’

‘And?’

I wasn’t quite sure how to say it, he might flip, spectacularly. But, after the conversation I’d just had it was a risk I had to take.

After taking a deep breath I blurted the words out. ‘Do you mind if we take a group of patients into town instead?’

‘What? Are you serious?’

‘Yes, but it’s not what you think. They’re nice lads and have had a really horrible time since their car nose-dived into ditch a couple of months ago.’ I hesitated, knowing Carl would think I’d lost the plot.

He said nothing and his silence confirmed my suspicions. He’d likely put the phone down in about five seconds time. I couldn’t help myself, though. My heartstrings had been tugged almost to snapping point by the boys’ pleas.

‘I’ve looked after them on several occasions,’ I went on, my words tumbling out, eager to explain before he gave up on me altogether. ‘They’re much better now, not ready for home or anything, but they’ve been given a pass for one night to celebrate Tim’s birthday. They just want a non-hospital meal and a couple of pints, nothing wild, not when they’re all in wheelchairs.’

There was a pause then, ‘Can’t their family or friends take them?’ He sounded more disbelieving than shocked and I hoped that was a good sign.

‘No, they’re from Essex, no visitors tomorrow. Besides, the pass is on the condition they’re accompanied by nurses.’

‘Well, surely orthopaedic nurses can do it.

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