Catch Me When I Fall by Nicci French

Author:Nicci French [French, Nicci]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Tags: C429, Extratorrents, Kat
ISBN: 9780141918488
Publisher: Penguin Adult
Published: 2005-01-23T13:00:00+00:00

19

Charlie woke me the next day. He helped me to sit up and gave me a flannel wrapped around several cubes of ice for my cheek, and a mug of coffee, very hot and very strong. He sat by me on the bed and watched me drink it. It brought me round a bit. The layer of glass that seemed to separate me from everything that wasn’t me grew a bit thinner.

‘I’m sorry,’ I said. ‘About… about, well, everything, really.’

‘That’s all right,’ he said, stroking my hair.

‘I think I’m not completely well.’

‘We’re going to get you better,’ he said.

‘Oh, Charlie,’ I said. ‘I know you’re good at fixing things, but…’

‘It’ll be my hobby.’ He had shining eyes.

I wanted to say, Who are you sleeping with? I knew there was someone: he was being so attentive and yet at the same time so remote. All of a sudden, he looked younger, smoother, more like the eager young man I’d met and fallen for a year ago. I wanted to say: ‘Why don’t we stop lying to each other? Why don’t we spill out the dirty, toxic truth and look at it and call it by its name?’ Instead I touched his cheek and rolled away so he wouldn’t see my face.

It was almost eight o’clock. I would leave work at six. I would have to play the part of Holly Krauss for ten hours until I could get off the stage, lock the door and go to bed. If I could get through the day without making anything worse, tomorrow would be a little better and so on and so on.

At first it went all right. I got through all the early-morning rituals and I even managed to pick at something that Charlie pushed in front of me, saying it was important to eat, which sounded right. My skin felt prickly as if I had just been ill or was just about to become ill. A light fog hung over everything, indoors as well as outside. I took great care dressing and applying makeup, my disguise, my armour against the world, although nothing could coverupmy puffy discoloured cheek. I pulled on mycoat under Charlie’s careful gaze.

Before leaving for work, I took my mobile out into the garden, where there was no chance of Charlie overhearing, and phoned Stuart.

‘Holly? Well, well, well. I didn’t think I’d be hearing from you for a bit.’

‘Oh?’ I said weakly.

‘Great evening, wasn’t it?’ he said, too loudly.

‘Which one?’

‘I guess you have lots to choose from. I was thinking of your card-playing exploits and everything that went with them.’

‘That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.’

‘Where shall we meet, then?’ he asked, strangely quick to agree.

I took a deep breath. I didn’t want to meet him at all but I couldn’t think of a way of saying, ‘I need a big favour but could we handle it quickly?’ over the phone. So we made an arrangement for mid-morning.

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