Bedroom Bully by Trista Russell

Author:Trista Russell
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Pocket Books
Published: 2009-04-15T00:00:00+00:00

JOURNAL ENTRY:

Audra

“Mama.” I knew that if she could hear me, she would answer, but I kept calling out to her anyway, in hopes that something within her would fight to reply to me. “Mama.”

Though I had been staring at her for hours, part of me still felt like I was in the wrong room. She didn’t look like herself. She hadn’t been wearing her seat belt and went through the windshield of her car. But although the woman in the bed didn’t look like my mother, the warm and loving spirit she always walked around with was there, so I knew it was her.

The room door opened again. “How you doing, baby?” Auntie Pat asked as she walked in.

“I’m fine.” I had a habit of saying that even on the worst days. Mama always used to tell me to stop lying.

“Now, I know you’re not doing fine,” she said as she hugged me. “It’s okay, though, baby.”

Patricia Berry and my mother have sat in the same pew at church for more than twenty years. Passing each other gum, mints, and notes, and sharing offering when the other didn’t have any, they were the best of friends. Seventeen years ago, when I was fifteen, Ms. Patty’s husband died suddenly and left her and the three kids with next to nothing. They had to live with us for almost a year, which is when I started calling her Auntie Pat.

“Why don’t you go home and get some rest, shower, and change,” Auntie Pat said as she ended our embrace.

I had been sitting here with Mama for twenty-four hours straight with no sleep, but I said, “I can’t leave her, Auntie Pat. I’m scared.”

“Scared of what?” she asked.

“Of coming back and her being . . . gone.” I was crying again. “I’m okay.”

“No, you’re not,” she said. “You need to get some rest, Audra, plus these are the clothes you wore to work yesterday. You need to freshen up, honey.”

I thought about it. Mama would kill me if she knew I was all up on her and hadn’t washed between my thighs since yesterday morning. “Okay,” I conceded, “I’ll go, but I’m not going to sleep. I’ll just shower and come right back.”

“That’s fine,” she said.

“I’ll see you when I get back, if you’re still here.”

“Still here?” she asked, as though I was insulting her. “Where else I got to be? This is my sister.”

I kissed her on the cheek and then turned to Mama. “I’m leaving for a few hours, Mama, just so that I can change. I’ll be right back.” I touched her hand. “I love you.” It still took me a few minutes to physically leave the room. I longed to be in her presence.

I went into the waiting room to thank everyone there for their support. My dad was remarkable. Though he and Mom divorced when I was eighteen, he was there like they had never missed a beat together. “Oh, Audra, the young man told me to tell you that he has a family member in room six fifty-two he is visiting.

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