An Editor's Tales by Anthony Trollope
Author:Anthony Trollope [Trollope, Anthony]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781411440678
Publisher: Barnes & Noble
Published: 2017-02-03T00:00:00+00:00
PART IIâDESPAIR
A FORTNIGHT had been given to us to prepare our matter, and during that fortnight I saw none of my colleagues. I purposely kept myself apart from them in order that I might thus give a fairer chance to the scheme which had been adopted. Others might borrow or lend their pages, but I would do the work allotted to me, and would attend the next meeting as anxious for the establishment and maintenance of the Panjandrum as I had been when I had hoped that the great consideration which I had given personally to the matter might have been allowed to have some weight. And gradually, as I devoted the first day of my fortnight to thinking of my work, I taught myself to hope again, and to look forward to a time when, by the sheer weight of my own industry and persistency, I might acquire that influence with my companions of which I had dreamed of becoming the master. After all, could I blame them for not trusting me, when as yet I had given them no ground for such confidence? What had I done that they should be willing to put their thoughts, their aspirations, their very brains and inner selves under my control? But something might be done which would force them to regard me as their leader. So I worked hard at my twenty-one pages, and during the fortnight spoke no word of the "Panjandrum" to any human being.
But my work did not get itself done without very great mental distress. The choice of a subject had been left free to each contributor. For myself I would almost have preferred that someone should have dictated to me the matter to which I should devote myself. How would it be with our first number if each of us were to write a political essay of exactly twenty-one pages, or a poem of that length in blank verse, or a humorous narrative? Good Heavens! How were we to expect success with the public if there were no agreement between ourselves as to the nature of our contributions, no editorial power in existence for our mutual support? I went down and saw Mr. X., and found him to be almost indifferent as to the magazine. "You see, Sir," said he, "the matter isn't in my hands. If I can give any assistance, I shall be very happy; but it seems to me that you want some one with experience." "I could have put them right if they'd have let me," I replied. He was very civil, but it was quite clear to me that Mr. X.'s interest in the matter was over since the day of his banishment from Mrs. St. Quinten's tea-table. "What do you think is a good sort of subject," I asked him,âas it were cursorily; "with a view, you know, to the eye of the public, just at the present moment?" He declined to suggest any subject, and I was thrown back among the depths of my own feelings and convictions.
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