Zigzags by Kamala Puligandla

Author:Kamala Puligandla [Puligandla, Kamala]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Not a Cult

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There was a healthy crowd around the bar at Simon’s, and a wave of trepidation washed over me when I saw that Mona was working again. Then I remembered my recent lecture on shame, and I really couldn’t have cared less what Mona thought of me and Richard.

“What am I pouring you two tonight?” she asked. “Whiskeys?”

“Actually, let’s make the first one a scotch,” I said. Mona raised her eyebrow. “Celebrating?”

“My much older, much more attractive girlfriend dumped me,” Richard said flatly, and crossed his arms on the top of the bar.

I watched Mona put together that Richard wasn’t gay, that he wasn’t dating me, and that his bluntness was defeat, not self- deprecating humor. This was expressed through a series of head nods and glances back and forth between Richard and myself. “So, okay. Rocks or neat?”

“Whatever you feel like, doll.” “Make mine neat,” I said.

“My condolences,” Mona said when she returned. “Holler when you’re ready for more.”

Richard was limply slumped on the bar. “So listen,” I said. “I realize it’s much too soon to say this, but you know it’s for the best, don’t you? You knew you didn’t have a serious future with Karen.” I had never been good at break-up debriefings. To me, it seemed best to confront things in their full awfulness all at once and move on, rather than slide slowly into their blackness.

“Jesus, Aneesha,” Richard said, and reached for his drink. “And I thought you might cheer me up.”

“Fine,” I said, raising my glass. “To sniffing all the hair you’d like, openly and unabashedly.”

He laughed, and hooked his hand around my shoulder so he could sniff my hair. “You always have such nice-smelling hair product. It’s spicy, earthy.”

“It’s for men,” I said.

Richard laughed again. “It would be, and I would find that appealing. Do you think a lesbian would have sex with me now that I’m available?”

I beamed. Richard was back. “Let’s think about this. Because I don’t think it’s totally implausible, but what kind of lesbian would be into you, do you think?”

We drank our scotch, and brainstormed, and switched back to whiskey, because I wanted the beer back and couldn’t figure out why they didn’t offer them with scotch. “Tradition’s a bitch,” Mona answered when I asked. The Cure was playing in the background, and there was a group of girls by the popcorn machine, one of whom in a tan leather jacket looked particularly adorable, and I had a lovely view of them. Richard was explaining to me how much he liked penetrating versus penetration when I felt a buzz in my pocket.

“Well, what about Mona, for example?” he asked.

“Mona’s not gay,” I said, and saw that I had a text from Zoe.

“What, because she doesn’t have a pink triangle tattooed on her face or because she didn’t hit on you?”

“Obviously neither,” I said, and watched Mona bring beers to the cute girls at the end of the bar. “She’s into dudes. The skinny kind with deep voices who look

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