This Is How We Are Human by Louise Beech

Author:Louise Beech
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Orenda Books
Published: 2021-12-15T00:00:00+00:00

Veronica arrives at the farm café early. Christmas lights still hang from the spiky trees along the path. A playful, icy wind tugs the silver Gucci scarf from her neck, taking it across one of the fields, Veronica in pursuit. Once caught, she ties it more firmly. When she returns to the car, out of breath and flushed, Isabelle is standing next to it, smiling, obviously having seen the clumsy chase. Veronica is momentarily angry at her amusement – or is it at her youth and ability to captivate her son?

‘It’s bitterly cold today, isn’t it?’ says Isabelle.

‘I’m ready for spring,’ admits Veronica gruffly. ‘Shall we?’

They go into the warm, brightly lit café, which smells of strong coffee and cinnamon, and take a table by a window looking over the frosted fields. Veronica studies Isabelle; the lovely skin ruined by tired lines beneath the eyes, the golden hair in a loose ponytail, the two holes in each ear where previously diamond earrings hung. She blushes, remembering when they first met, and how Isabelle thought she wanted sex with her. She also remembers them sitting in Isabelle’s car outside the house, plain together. Stripped.

Veronica’s anger dissipates. This girl is vulnerable. Nervous.

The waitress takes their order – two lattes. Veronica wants to ask about Sebastian. What did they do, what has he been like? But Isabelle speaks first.

‘I need to be honest with you,’ she says.

‘OK.’

‘This won’t work otherwise.’

‘Won’t work? You haven’t…’

‘What?’ asks Isabelle.

‘Changed your mind?’

‘No.’ Isabelle shakes her head vigorously. ‘But I have to tell you about my situation. I suppose this has been very one-sided. I know your life. Your difficulty. But I could never talk about my reasons for doing what I do … what I did. It was no part of this … deal. But now … now it is.’

Isabelle pauses when the drinks arrive.

‘The thing is…’

Veronica waits, hoping her silence will give Isabelle the time she needs.

‘My dad’s been very ill.’ Isabelle sips the milky coffee. ‘He fell, hit his head, and they put him in a coma to recover. But I didn’t want him in a hospital. He begged me not to leave him there … they were his last words…’ Isabelle holds Veronica’s gaze. Veronica sees pain in her eyes. Lifelong pain. Recent pain. Pain that is still bleeding. ‘Since I was tiny, he’s taken care of me. Now I’ve been taking care of him, at home, and that costs. I had to find the money, somehow, and well, you know how…’

Veronica nods, feeling sad for the young woman.

‘Your money isn’t for me,’ says Isabelle. ‘It’s for him. But now…’

‘Now what?’ asks Veronica kindly.

‘Now he’s back. Well, not back like he was before.’ Isabelle inhales as though bracing herself. ‘They started bringing him out of the coma on Thursday, and last night – while Sebastian was with me – he opened his eyes. It wasn’t for long, and he’s only opened them for ten minutes at a time since, but he’s coming around.’

‘That’s wonderful,’ smiles Veronica.

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