The Secret Child: A gripping novel of family secrets that will leave you in tears by Kerry Fisher

Author:Kerry Fisher
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781786813077
Publisher: Bookouture

26

February 1996

I didn’t dare risk going back to the hotel to spy on Grace, though it nearly killed me to stay away. But as January rolled into February, there were signs she’d started to miss us. Or Danny at least. A couple of times she’d waited for him outside work and they’d gone for a drink. I pushed aside the hurt she wanted to see him but not me. Instead, like a greedy Labrador coming across an unexpected bowlful of food, I barely paused for breath between questions, hungry for answers. ‘What did she say about work? Is she doing more singing or more waitressing? Are they paying her properly? Did she say anything about me?’ But however hard Danny tried to remember their conversations, I always felt he hadn’t ‘got to the bottom of it’ in the way I would have done. Which was probably why she chose to see him. He ran his hand through his hair, trying to find a response that would satisfy ‘How did she look?’ Obviously the blokey ‘Just the same’ didn’t tell me what I needed to know. ‘Was she fatter, thinner, did she look tired, do you think she’s eating all right?’

In the end, he’d get exasperated. ‘I don’t know, love. She seemed fine.’

Which mother in the entire world had ever been satisfied with their offspring being described as ‘fine’? It made me want to jump on the bus with vats of home-made soup, a new pack of M&S pants and a fresh toothbrush. I wondered if she ever changed her bed or hoovered her room. ‘Did she mention a boyfriend?’

Danny frowned. ‘She mentioned various men who worked at the hotel, but I didn’t get the impression she was seeing anyone. She seems far more interested in her music, to be honest. Said she was writing some songs and that she’d teamed up with a guy who puts them to music.’

‘What guy? Someone her age?’

‘I’m not sure. I think it’s someone who does some of the music spots at the hotel at weekends.’

‘Didn’t you ask?’

Finally, Danny got cross. ‘For god’s sake, Suze! I don’t bloody ask anything. I sit and let her talk and hope to God that one day we’ll have a normal relationship with her and she’ll come round for Sunday lunch like any other daughter, instead of sitting waiting for me on a wall outside the factory in the rain.’

I knew he was right. I wanted to turn the clock back and do it all again. But do it right this time.

Initially, I’d agreed with Danny and thought that Grace would come home within weeks if not days. But when it became clear that she had left permanently with no intention of coming back, it dawned on me I had no idea when I would see her again.

Some nights I’d sit in front of the telly with Danny, the figures moving on the screen, the dialogue washing over me. Eventually I’d blurt out, ‘Have I really been such a

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