The Christmas Vampire: A Short Story by Dean Shearer

Author:Dean Shearer [Shearer, Dean]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Shearer Shorts

Three

When I woke up it was still dark out, and immediately I jerked upright. Had that been a dream? I looked at my ankle. It was wrapped in white cloth, splotched here and there with blood.

Nope. Not a dream.

I noted that my head felt like complete shit, and decided that I should go back to bed for a little while. Just as my head hit the pillow, there was a creak of the floorboards from the hallway, and I froze just where I was.

I sighed with relief when Abby Sue, Miss Diddily Doo came barging through the door, announcing that it was time to open presents, come on come on come on! The angel jumped up onto the bed and shook me and took me by the hand and pulled me to my feet and pulled me down the hallway to the living room.

“Abby,” sighed my brother, when we came into the living room.

“It’s fine,” I said, smiling at him, then yawning. I had awful morning breath. Everyone was in the living room. Apparently I was the last one up. “Merry Christmas everyone,” I said, wondering how many of them knew what had happened last night.

“Merry Christmas!” said everyone, including everyone I was sure had seen what had gone down last night.

Which surprised me. Last night I almost let a vampire into our house. So filled with desire, I opened the window for the vampire. You thought she was a goddess, chill out, I thought, as I sat down next to my mom by the fire and put an arm over her shoulder.

We got to the presents right away. The stockings had already been emptied, I saw, and I concluded that everyone had been up for quite a while and, antsy, had decided to do the stockings without me. No problem with me. I was here for the presents, the main event.

Unlike Christmas Eve, we all open our presents all at once on Christmas Morning. There's just so many presents. If we did it that way it would be afternoon by the time we got done. We get through with the presents fast (which means about an hour and a half) and then have some breakfast, and then we all take a nap, and then it's dinner time, and that's when the real party starts. Unwrapping a present from my mother, everyone still going ham on their own, I decided I'd drink a beer or two tonight. Nothing crazy. Just a couple drinks to get my limbs feeling loosey-goosey. I smiled, looking forward to the fun night ahead.

Tossing the wrapping paper aside, I looked down at the present my mother had given me. I rolled my eyes. “A membership to the gym? What, you think I’m getting fat?” I slapped my belly, which was no more than muscle and skin.

“No,” she said in my ear, so I could hear her over the chaos: the tearing of paper, the excited screams, the thank you’s and no ways and awhhhhhs. “It’s so you can meet a girl,” she said.

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