The Book Swap by Tessa Bickers

Author:Tessa Bickers
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Graydon House Books
Published: 2024-07-10T17:47:08+00:00

17

ERIN

It’s only after I’ve squashed down next to him that I realize who it is. James Parr.

I’m closer to him than we ever sat in English class. Closer than we’ve ever been, except that one time I touched his hand back at school. Our shoulders are touching. I can feel the warmth of his breath and the strength of his gaze as he realizes it’s me.

His eyes widen, reflecting the shock I feel. He must have got caught in the shower too, because his light brown hair’s slicked back with rain and tiny droplets cover his thick lashes. His jaw’s covered in a stubble I’ve never seen before and it sends my brain spinning in a way it didn’t at Bonnie’s memorial. It’s James, but so much older. He’s a man now and it’s like I’ve only just realized it.

He swallows, his Adam’s apple moving up and then down. He keeps glancing at my arm and back to my face, before he holds his hands up, edging toward the steamed-up window behind him and creating a space between our shoulders. “Hi, Erin,” he mumbles, swallowing. He runs his eyes across my face and shakes his head, a smile dying on his lips.

In my last session with Philippa, James was the main subject. She made me relive what happened between us, and go over my reaction to him at Bonnie’s memorial. How strong my response was, after so many years. How it might have been a shock to him, in the same way this chance meeting appears to be. It’s like this is some kind of test, and I feel like I’m failing, because I can’t move on and be civil. One look at his face and I’m back in my childhood bedroom. The room I didn’t leave for weeks, after what happened. I just lay there, staring at the wall, wishing my life could go back to the way it was before.

My heart is filling with pain at everything I lived through as a result of what James did.

I can feel my body starting to shake, and I move my tote bag farther onto my lap, gripping it so hard my fingers go white. I turn my face away and into the arse of the man who’s blocking my exit. Shrinking backward, I stare straight ahead, checking my watch. It’s too late at night to walk, but I can’t stay on this bus. Can’t sit this close to him, feeling the heat of him against me. A flash of memory appears, hitting my cheeks. We were at a house party, back in the days when we were close. I had got myself locked in the bathroom. I was pulling at the door, but I couldn’t get it open. Someone was on the other side trying to help. It was so loud, I couldn’t hear who it was. I pulled extra hard just as they pushed—and the door flew open, James catapulting his way toward me, slamming hard against me, against the wall.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.