Shyness and Dignity by Dag Solstad

Author:Dag Solstad
Language: eng
Format: epub, azw3
ISBN: 978-1-55597-944-7
Publisher: Graywolf Press
Published: 2015-09-06T16:00:00+00:00

It was the year 1989. Elias Rukla was a quiet-mannered Norwegian high school teacher who had not distinguished himself in any way whatsoever in his life, which did not bother him, since he had never imagined he would distinguish himself in any way. He was an average, socially oriented Norwegian citizen who read his newspapers, watched TV, read his books and had his thoughts, and went to his job at Fagerborg High School every day. The only sensational aspect of his life seemed to be that he had acquired such an attractive wife at thirty-six years of age, thirteen years ago. That was clear to him from the many surprised glances that brushed his face when he appeared with Eva Linde and could introduce her as his wife. Incidentally, her beauty was now greatly faded. She had spread out a good deal, and she had lost her charm. Elias Rukla did not much mind. True, his heart would sink when looking at photographs of Eva thirteen years ago and comparing them with the woman in her mid-forties he was married to, who shared the same identity but little else. A sensitive awareness of life’s transitoriness, apropos of Eva’s lost charm. Sadness. And the loss of the surprised glances, which he had to admit he missed, because everyone regrets having his own luster wear off, and that was, of course, what happened when Eva lost her luster, for then it was he, above all, who lost it, vis-à-vis the others. These are things that count, Elias Rukla thought, when he sat in the living room by himself in the evening, with his beer and his aquavit. He would sit thus quite often. As the years passed, his inclination to overindulge in drink had increased. Now he would sit up in the evenings after Eva had gone to bed. It had become a habit that had a calming effect on him; he needed a bit of time to himself, with his aquavit and his beer. For something had happened to him that he had difficulty understanding, as well as resigning himself to. It was a slowly growing sense of having been socially put out of the running. He was greatly troubled by it, and he thought it was quite extraordinary that it should be this way. But it was as though little of what was offered him as a socially conscious individual was still of sufficient interest to him. Neither TV nor the papers managed to stimulate him any longer. He had difficulty giving a rational answer to why they didn’t. Anyway, they didn’t. Time and again he told himself, It isn’t that bad, after all. The newspapers have both news and culture pages, so what am I moaning about? And was it so much better before? No, it was not. People have always complained about the newspapers, and not least about TV, me too. But when, the next morning, he opened another paper, he had the same feeling of having been left out.

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