Sanctuary by Andi C. Buchanan

Author:Andi C. Buchanan [Andi C. Buchanan]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Robot Dinosaur Press
Published: 2022-03-17T00:00:00+00:00

I’m back in Saeed’s room to hear details of another round of research. I’ve changed my clothes entirely; my soaking socks and jeans are in the wash and my shoes are drying upside down on top of a radiator. I’m in the next step up from pyjamas; comfy trousers and a loose long-sleeved t-shirt. I’ve been wearing a small blanket round my shoulders but Saeed’s room is warm and I soon take it off.

“So, what revelation do you have for me today?” I ask.

Saeed’s face in response to my joking question indicates that this might actually be a significant revelation.

“This,” he says, bringing up a document and scooting his swivel chair back to enable me to take a closer look. It’s an image of a young woman, probably pencil drawn. I squint at her. There’s definitely something familiar about her but I struggle to work out who she reminds me of. I know it’s not a dead ringer – just some key features, a clear resemblance, but it’s definitely significant.

Then I realise who it is.

It’s me.

Saeed nods slowly as he sees me come to that conclusion. I look at it again.

It’s not exactly me. My history of not-entirely-legally-obtained hormone blockers, and then oestrogen and some laser hair removal, combined with the bone structure I was born with, means there are still some elements of my facial appearance not likely to be replicated in any other era. But I don’t think you could hold up pictures of us side by side and not think we were related. We could be siblings, perhaps, or even the same person at different points in their life. Either way, the resemblance is staggering.

I pause, trying to formulate a question.

“Who… who is she?” I ask, not sure I want to hear the answer. Saeed has prepared, of course.

“Her name was Hattie – we can assume that’s short for Harriet – Casswell. She was the direct descendent of the younger brother of William Casswell, who we otherwise know as the ghost eater. And… I'm rapidly coming to the conclusion that she’s your great great… maybe a few more greats… grandmother.”

I stare at the picture. I don’t know what I had been expecting Saeed to find, but it definitely wasn’t this. My nan always did say that we came from money somewhere along the line. I thought she was making it up, or at least that it had been exaggerated over the years. Well. Maybe I owe her an apology.

“In any case,” Saeed says. “I want to find out.”

With my help, Saeed sketches up a rough family tree for me. I give him my parents’ and grandparents’ names, those of the one great grandparent I remember, and I think through details that indicate ages and where they lived.

Meanwhile, I’m questioning everything. Not about my family – this is different to what I expected, but I didn’t know the truth to be any different really either. No, I’m wondering how much choice I have. Did I decide to live

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