New Millennium Boyz by Alex Kazemi

Author:Alex Kazemi [Kazemi, Alex]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781637583920
Publisher: Permuted Platinum
Published: 2023-06-09T11:28:15+00:00

52

“Never Let You Go” by Third Eye Blind is ending as we walk into McDonald’s. As I look at the line by the register, a guy with spiked hair and an “Internet Killed the Video Star” shirt in plaid pajamas and Docs grabs his order. He puts his headphones on as we make eye contact. Children are staring into the Barbie and Hot Wheels Happy Meal displays as I look across to the entrance of the birthday party room.

Lu puts a fry in his mouth. “What do you think of Michael Alig?”

“Who is he again? You talk about serial killers so much that I’m starting to lose track.”

“The club kid who chopped up his friend, taped him in a box, and threw him into the river because he thought he was an uncool try-hard. Talk about impressive life accomplishments.”

“Oh, him! I want to read the book his friend James St. James wrote. I heard about it on E!”

“Are you still bumming over the Shane heroin fiasco last night?”

“I mean, did you even go to a party in the nineties if your depressed friend didn’t threaten to shoot up drugs for attention? Isn’t that his whole shtick, being the miserable boy?”

“Well, we made it, we’re here. And in the first few hours, I still don’t feel any different.”

“Let’s face it, bro, new millennium or not, the world is always going to feel like random chaos.”

“It’s so corny to me how every movie trailer right now has a narrator teasing us about some promise to enter an underworld happening beneath the surface.”

“I was thinking that the other night! What could we be on the verge of? What will be revealed in 2000? What is going to be exposed?”

Lu plays with his straw. “Something and nothing is coming, all at the same time.”

I nod. “Why do people act shocked over how boring and depressing reality actually is?”

“Right? Big fucking deal. News flash: it’s been sad for centuries.”

I grab his drink and take a sip. “Have you done any cool stuff on your computer lately?”

“I’ve been killing it with these phishing programs to get passwords from people, like stealing people’s credit card numbers and stuff.”

“That’s so chopped.”

“Hacking is going to be part of my aesthetic this year. This year for me is going to be about, like, realizing stuff.”

“I keep thinking about all of the bad shit that goes down when you don’t know how to tolerate yourself.” I hold my stomach. “Seriously. I feel like I’m going to vomit out Flubber every time I fucking move.”

Lu rolls his eyes. “You embarrass me. I had my first hangover at twelve.”

“We can’t all be child stars, okay? I’m going to hurl.”

“You still managed to gangbang those nuggets.”

“You just went down on that double cheeseburger.”

Lu pulls out his Polaroid and tells me to smile. I shoot a middle finger instead.

“Special moments. Our first hangover at McDonald’s.” The picture spits out and he puts it in his bag.

I look over to the ball pit and the playhouse and watch little kids hold onto the netting.

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