Lesbian Cowboy (Sapphic Sweethearts Book 3) by Jones Kitty

Author:Jones, Kitty [Jones, Kitty]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Kitty Jones
Published: 2023-11-30T00:00:00+00:00

11

Ashley

“I t’s just me,” I squeak out quickly as I feel her tense.

It’s just me hiding in her bed like a total weirdo. It’s just me sitting here, hoping that everything is going to be okay.

It’s just me.

“Oh,” she says, but she’s still breathing a lot heavier than she was a moment ago.

“I’m sorry,” I say quickly. “I...”

I got scared of the stupid thunderstorm.

“I got lonely.”

“You were scared of the thunder, huh?”

“Yes.”

“That’s okay,” she says quickly, which is nice of her, but unnecessary. I know that I’m a complete weirdo. I know that being an adult who is scared of the rain is something to be embarrassed about, and I am. I’m embarrassed about this. I’m embarrassed about the fact that I’m a business lady who still gets scared.

I’m embarrassed that Sarah gets to see me like this.

“That’s okay,” she repeats.

“It’s not okay, but thank you.”

“Everyone is scared of something.”

“That’s what my therapist says, too.”

“You’re in therapy?”

I pause.

Hesitation.

I wasn’t planning on telling her.

I’m not sure why, but the idea of sharing something so personal with another human feels embarrassing. Again with the shame and humiliation. These are emotions I’m not used to feeling, and I’m not entirely sure what to do with them. I know that I need to figure this out, of course. Otherwise, I’m going to end up right where I was before – in trouble. Stressed. Devastated.

I’m going to end up in another relationship where I can’t express myself because I’m too worried about what the other person will think instead of focusing on how I can be a better person for them and with them.

“Yeah,” I finally say. “I thought it was time.”

“I’m proud of you.”

The words shouldn’t mean as much to me as they do.

Sarah turns, lying on her side, and faces me.

“What made you decide to go to therapy?”

“I figured that I needed to find a way to balance my anxiety.” My stress levels were somehow even higher than they are now. “There are a lot of things I can’t talk about with anyone at work, so talking to a therapist helps. I still can’t say anything I want to because of NDAs and that sort of thing, but having someone is helpful.”

Sarah is quiet for a second, and I wonder what’s going through that pretty head of hers. I’m also wondering if she realizes our toes are touching. I won’t tell if she won’t.

“I’m in therapy, too.”

“Really?”

“I realized, finally, that it wasn’t just something you could utilize when you’re dealing with something majorly serious. You know, I just feel very...weighted. I don’t know if that makes sense.”

“Like there’s an anchor on your heart.”

“Basically, yeah, and I thought that maybe talking to someone would help.”

“And has it?”

“It has,” she nods. “I think I’ll keep going for a while. Probably as long as he’ll have me,” she chuckles.

“I’m sure your therapist adores you.”

“Geroge is great,” she agrees.

“Wait,” I pause. “George who?”

“George Salmon,” she cocks her head. “Why? Have you heard of him?”

“Oh,” I roll my eyes.

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