Kanye West Reanimator by Joshua Chaplinsky & H P Lovecraft

Author:Joshua Chaplinsky & H P Lovecraft [Chaplinsky, Joshua & Lovecraft, H P]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Rap, genre fiction, Hip Hop, horror, Parody, HP Lovecraft, Kanye West, Fiction, Reanimator
ISBN: 9780692084182
Publisher: YOLO HOUSE PUBLISHER
Published: 2018-03-15T23:00:00+00:00

V. The Horror of the Hova

Many rappers have related hideous things in their music; events which took place on the streets of the Bronx or the city of Compton. Some of these things have made me faint, others have convulsed me with devastating nausea, while still others have made me tremble and look over my shoulder in the dark; yet despite the worst of them I believe I can myself relate the most hideous thing of all — the shocking, the unnatural, the unbelievable horror of Jay-Z and Kanye’s falling out.

The incident with his mother had put Kanye off his Frankenstein-like experiments for a while. The publicity cycle for 808s & Heartbreak wound down and things got back to normal — normal for Kanye, that is. He shot his mouth off at the MTV Music Awards, cancelled a tour with Lady Gaga, and retreated to a Hawaii recording studio to lick his wounds. He threw himself into fashion, and fashion threw him right back out. He released My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy, collaborated with Jay-Z on Watch the Throne, and released the Cruel Summer compilation on his own GOOD Music record label. I was his constant companion through it all and I have to say, he seemed to be making good on his promise to reanimate hip-hop. I had never seen him so focused. Our bond was stronger than ever.

Then Kimye happened.

Not even Kanye’s Auto-Tuneless performance of “Love Lockdown” on Saturday Night Live was more wretched than the dolorous lament of my soul. His bromance with mentor Jay-Z I could handle, dalliances with aspiring starlets, fine — but this . . . this was not good. Kanye had spent his whole career trying to perpetuate the image of a brilliant artist, but by shacking up with that tabloid queen, whose career was a causal loop of fame for fame’s sake, and proclaiming her his “Perfect Bitch,” he was undermining the ideals he had strived so hard to espouse.

Almost immediately I was pushed aside, relegated to clandestine work in the studio while Kanye and Kim tried to take over the world like a pair of genetically enhanced laboratory mice. It was a lonely time for me, although I was relieved that the only life Kanye was attempting to create was in a Kardashian womb, unappealing as that may be. In fact, it wasn’t long before he proclaimed himself an expectant father to a sold out crowd in Atlantic City. The next day, this was confirmed by Kim on her personal blog.

I have to say, North West was the only good thing to come out of this whole charade. I took to that little bundle of boogers almost immediately. When Kanye would bring her to the studio I would play the role of dutiful babysitter. Although a very public campaign was run by Kim’s friend Jonathan Cheban, and most people suspected it would be Jay-Z, I became the child’s de facto godfather. I paid more attention to her than her own parents, who were constantly preoccupied with their careers.

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