Finding Carson Lee (Oh Captan, My Captain #3) by Lindsay Paige

Author:Lindsay Paige [Paige, Lindsay]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter Twenty-Two

Carson

Kinley is a fucking piece of work. I’m standing in my hotel room, wondering what in the hell just happened. I don’t know if things started going wrong when she said we couldn’t do this or when the model I’ve been working out with knocked on my door. Either way, it all went downhill. Part of me wants to go talk to Kinley, but her comment about being wrong about me keeps thrashing around in my head. I need to exercise and leave her alone.

With my room key in hand, I go downstairs to meet the girl, Stella. We’ve been working out together lately and it works because she has no interest in me whatsoever, seeing that she’s a lesbian. Yet, Kinley thinks I’m banging her. I probably couldn’t bribe her into putting her mouth on my dick. We silently fall into a jog on the treadmill first.

“You’re quieter than usual today,” Stella comments.

“I don’t have much to say.” I press a button to make the speed go up, so I can start running. My mind replays what happened again. Kinley practically melted against me as her body relaxed completely with the kiss. She took me by surprise with the sincerity of her words on top of a hug. It was weird how easy going and fun it was hanging out with her.

But it was nice too.

Different than usual.

The things she and her father have been saying to me lately refresh in my head. They both think that I can be better than who I am. They believe that there is a woman out there who is going to be so over-the-moon amazing and overlooks the faҫade I wear. Somewhere along the way, I’m supposed to change the way I see things and become the man who is worthy of such a woman.

The real, most important question that’s been weighing on me is if they are right, would I want that for myself? I told Kinley I didn’t. If I do, even a small part of me, then maybe I should get my shit together before that happens. Just in case.

When this is all over, I’ll be going back to a large, empty house on a big piece of land. There aren’t any photos of loved ones or even friends in my house. Hell, there aren’t any pictures at all. Instead, I have trophies and expensive shit that no one really cares about. I’m thirty years old and all of my accomplishments reside in a career and the material things I own. I’ve been stuck in my ways for such a long time, I may have permanently sealed myself there with no escape route available.

Should I open myself up to any possible opportunities or keep things the same and live in a house that has a revolving door for one night stands? The question has me wanting to run for the hills and never look back. For some reason, though, my fingers are pressing the off button, my hands grabbing a towel to wipe away the sweat on my face, and my body turning towards Stella.

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