Communism, Sex and Lies by Maria Genova

Author:Maria Genova [Genova, Maria]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Morton International Publishing
Published: 2017-05-31T22:00:00+00:00

Fainted

I tried to avoid Dimitar at school and that was quite easy. I noticed that he had been without a girlfriend for some time, but it did not occur to me to think that was my doing. Dimitar didn’t approach me. Until I met him once on a ski slope outside the city. He followed me and I decided to ski straight through the woods. I saw a small path further on that went up the mountain and let myself go. It was only at the last moment that I noticed that there was a stream in the bend. I tried to jump it. I almost thought I had made it, until one of my ski’s hit a stone. I fell in the icy snow, luckily just across the water.

‘Are you okay?’ Dimitar shouted. He had managed to come to a halt without falling.

‘Fine,’ I hastily said, even though I felt pain all over my body.

I suddenly fainted backwards with my knees locked. I hadn’t seen it coming.

I woke in DImitar’s arms.

‘How long was I out?’ was the first thing that occurred to me to ask.

‘Not that long. I slapped you a few times and then you woke up.’

‘You slapped me?’

Apparently, I must have felt better to sound so shocked.

‘And a kiss,’ he added.

‘How dare you!’

‘Calm down, I can never seem to do the right thing. No slapping, no kissing, what is it that you want?’

I hadn’t thought about that, so I decided to leave it.

Dimitar and I skied to the mountain hut.

‘I have a room here,’ he said. ‘You can leave your wet suit to dry. And don’t think I have an ulterior motive. I might not be an angel, but I’m not the devil either.’

I agreed to go to his room. I took off my wet suit and wrapped a blanket around me. We sat in silence on the bed. Every second of silence seemed to be filled with tense expectation.

‘Don’t you think we could make a go of it?’ he asked. I didn’t sense any provocation in his voice and that reassured me.

‘I don’t know. I think you’re attractive, but I don’t want a relationship with a playboy. Maybe we should just accept that we’re not meant for each other.’

‘You are really attached to that image you have of me, aren’t you?’

I now knew he was not some reckless womanizer, but I didn’t want to admit that. His romantic side had made too much of an impression on me and I was afraid to fall under his power. I preferred to have control. I knew that Dimitar wanted to have sex, but I didn’t even want to admit to myself that I was also open to this at this point. Deep inside I was a prudish girl, because this was part of my upbringing. Sex was not discussed, the subject matter could not be found in any magazine, your parents told you nothing and the sex education at school was limited to information over the fertilization of an egg by a seed.

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