Broken People by Sam Lansky

Author:Sam Lansky [Sam Lansky]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Hanover Square Press
Published: 2020-03-30T14:27:11+00:00

* * *

“Are you still experiencing effects?” Jacob asked.

Sam opened his eyes, jolting back into consciousness. He looked around the room. “No,” he said.

“No,” Buck said.

“Let’s close the ceremony then,” Jacob said. He bowed his head for a long moment of silence.

Sam was the one to break it. “Jacob,” he said.

“Yes, Sam,” Jacob said.

“Can I ask a question?”

“Sure,” he said.

“I know I asked you this already but is this, like, one of those things where it only works if we believe in it?” Sam could hear his voice, trembling with rage. He hadn’t realized how angry he was until he had started to speak. “Like, are we going to get to the end of the weekend and nothing happens and it’s, like, ‘Well, you didn’t have an experience because you didn’t trust the process enough’ or whatever?”

“I take it you did not experience strong effects tonight,” Jacob said.

“Nope,” Sam said. “I didn’t experience anything. And I didn’t really experience anything last night, either. Which has me wondering—what the fuck are we doing here?”

“To answer your question, no, your experience is not contingent upon your belief in the effectiveness of the work,” Jacob said crisply. “But to be honest with you, I think with this attitude, you’re really selling yourself short here.”

“Jacob, I have been nothing but open,” Sam said, trying to keep his voice steady. “I prepped religiously. I showed up willing to accept whatever this was going to be. But I’ve spent two nights lying here bored crawling through the catacombs of my mind in the same mundane, torturous way I do every fucking day, and I gotta tell you, it isn’t bringing me one iota of relief. Nothing cosmic is happening here. This is not a spiritual experience. I don’t even know what this is.”

Buck rested his hand on Sam’s arm as if to say, Calm down. “Actually, I do know what this is,” Sam said. “It’s a colossal fucking waste of time.”

“Jacob,” Buck said politely. “Is it possible that there’s something…wrong with this medicine? Like, it’s not strong enough?”

Jacob laughed. “No,” he said. “This is extremely powerful medicine.”

“Then why isn’t anything happening?” Sam said.

“Well, it can take many ceremonies to experience the full effects of the spirit,” Jacob said. “Ten or fifteen, even.”

“Ten or fifteen?” Buck said incredulously, sitting up.

“Or more,” Jacob said. “Listen, you have no idea what’s happening out there in the other dimension, man. It may not feel like there’s a lot going on but you just have to trust me on this.”

“What difference does it make what’s happening in that dimension if I can’t feel it in this one?” Sam said.

“You don’t get to have this experience on your terms,” Jacob said.

“Fine,” Sam said. “But I’m tired. I’m hungry. I’m extremely sexually frustrated. I’m, like, weirdly congested? And I am experiencing nothing in the way of healing. So I kind of just want to, like, go home, jerk off, get Shake Shack, take a Benadryl and sleep in my own bed.” Sam stood up.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.