b, Book, and Me by Kim Sagwa

Author:Kim Sagwa
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
ISBN: 9781931883962
Publisher: Two Lines Press
Published: 2019-07-14T16:00:00+00:00

I’m just experimenting.

No, you’re crazy and you’re trying to kill yourself.

That’s not it. I just want to know.

Know what?

Exactly how desperate I can be.

1

We went to the End.

2

I was watching the sea. Golden birds flew over the red-tinged sea. A faraway boat swayed in black shadows. The crimson waves shook the sea as they rippled. I made up my mind: I won’t go back to school. No, I won’t do anything. Just like Book. I turned to look behind me. Book was sitting on the sand, reading. He read with his neck stretched toward the book as though trying to climb into it. “There are all sorts of books in the world,” Book once said. “Because all sorts of people write all sorts of books. They’re all about the world outside the book, which means all things start outside the book but end up within a book. That’s what I want. I want to go into books.” That’s what Book had said when we were at his house, eating ramyeon. Book had continued: “All I do is read. I don’t do anything else. I don’t write reviews. I’m not inspired to draw or sing. I don’t get smarter or broader or narrower. I don’t become deeper or shallower. I don’t become more of an adult or more childlike. I don’t become more abundant or barren. That’s the true way to read books, I think. Most people read to learn something new. Or to gain something: to get smarter, to transform or be transformed, to be different, to reflect, to remember, to grow deeper, get better or worse. They read to shake off boredom or sadness, or they read to be sad, or bored, or happy; to be unhappy, to be angry or hold back anger, to forgive or not forgive, to cry, to dry their tears. They read because they’re afraid. But I’m not afraid. I came out here to really read books. I don’t know anyone here, I don’t know this city, and I don’t care about it. I don’t want to know anything about it—I just want to read. People say it’s not healthy to do nothing except read. They say I should do something else. They say I should watch movies, meet people, eat good food. I should wonder about this city, this country, and this world that I live in. But I don’t agree with them. No, I don’t want to do any of that. I wish everyone would leave me alone. I don’t care where I live or if the country changes its name tomorrow or if the world comes to an end. Everything is always the same anyway. People are born and people die. In between, they eat. They eat so they won’t die. That’s it. So, it really doesn’t matter to me whether I eat ramyeon or bread. I just need books. People think I’m like this because I’m crazy. But I think they’re just as crazy as I am. Everyone is crazy. Out of their minds.

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