At Your Own Risk by Derek Jarman

Author:Derek Jarman
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Random House
Published: 2017-12-14T05:00:00+00:00

EVERYTHING YOU ALWAYS WANTED TO KNOW ABOUT SEX

The sex manual, like the coffee table book and the colour supplement, was fearfully straight. Doctor David R. Reuben’s 1971 book was a great one:

The usual homosexual experience is mutual masturbation. It is fast, easy and requires a minimum amount of equipment. The chaps simply undress, get into bed and manipulate each other’s penises to the point of orgasm. Three to five minutes should be enough for the entire operation.

Few homosexuals use their real names, they generally go by aliases choosing first names with a sexual connotation; Harry, Dick, Peter are the most favoured. One drops to his knees, the other unzips his pants and a few moments later it’s all over. No names, no faces, no emotions. A masturbation machine might do it better.

Most homosexuals find their man-to-man sex unfulfilling, so they masturbate a lot. Much of their masturbation centres around the anus. The question, of course, is what to use for a penis. The answer is often found in the pantry. Carrots and cucumbers are pressed into service, forced into the anus lubricated with vegetable oil. Sausages, especially the milder varieties, are popular.

Some of the more routine items which find their way into the gastrointestinal systems of homosexuals via the exit are pens, pencils, lipsticks, pop bottles, ladies’ electric shavers and enough other items to stock a small department store.

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